I love the car-ride conversations with my daughter on her way to her preschool. I never know what the topic will be or where the conversation will turn. That’s just the norm for having an almost-four-year-old.
Recently, we turned into the parking lot, and I reminded her to be a good girl, to listen to her teachers and do what they said. From the back seat, I heard an exaggerated, resigned sigh as she said, “OK, Mommy.”
I replied, “It’s tough listening sometimes, isn’t it honey?”
Her response was classic, “Yeah, mommy, it’s tough being three.”
As an adult, I laughed because I thought to myself, “Just wait until you become an adult.” She doesn’t deal with an evaporating 401K, deadlines for manuscripts, conflicts with dysfunctional extended family, or car repairs. But then I stopped and remembered—through her eyes, in her mind, based on her experiences, life IS tough.
I must admit that when working with teen girls, sometimes I get a little dismissive when they complain about how difficult their lives are. Then I remember—through their eyes, through their cognitive and emotional filters, through their life experiences, life IS tough.
It’s tough to wake up one morning and have your body wig out on you. It’s tough to endure mean girls and gossip. It’s tough to navigate relationships with boys (and that doesn’t get any easier when you become an adult!). It’s tough to figure out who you are when everyone—from the media to your parents to your friends—is constantly telling you what you should be like.
When I remember that, I am a little more compassionate, a little more patient, and I relax a little bit. Growing up is just hard, no matter what age you are. It’s still hard for me, too.
Well said... by K and you! And life is tough! Thanks for the reminder and the encouragement for a different perspective on what my girls are thinking/feeling!