Right there with you...

Yesterday at church, my friend Erica was talking with me about the Inside Girls Ministry blog. My first thought was “WOW! I wasn’t sure if anyone ever really read this thing!” My second thought was when Erica said, “I’m right there with you.”

You see Erica and I are both moms of daughters and both involved in girls’ ministry. However, some of our involvement is by choice and some is by default. Often we find ourselves caught up in girls’ ministry simply because we are around girls 24/7. Whether we want it or not, girls’ ministry is something we cannot get away from—because regardless of where we turn or what we do, girls are there! But those same girls are also such a huge blessing in the midst of the chaos!

As I’ve been pondering this life with three daughters, their BFF’s, and all the other girls that intersect with my life through our church and community, I continue to see my dependence on others, like Erica, who are in this boat with me. I need to know that others are thinking, feeling, and going through the same trials and joys as they minister to the girls in their life. (And there is something inside me that screams for all the help I can get!)

It is interesting how when you share that you are open to help and advice more people are willing to give it. Two pieces of great “mom” advice recently came my way. (Probably because I am so open to receiving help these days…actually begging for it on occasion!)

1. Middle school and high school are those years when your student moves from dependence to independence and that is sometimes why the struggle is so great between students and adults. Remember that you want your “girls” to become independent. You want them to be able to stand up for themselves and live on their own. Those middle school and high school years are preparing them to be on their own—with independent living skills and independent decision-making skills.
2. Plan to drive. Be ready at a moment’s notice to jump in the car and drive your daughter and/or her friends to all those spontaneous gatherings that happen among teen girls. Know it in your head and leave open time in your schedule. Before the girls even ask, know that you are going to be a chauffer and plan to do it willingly. Being a driver helps you to be present and stay involved even when the girls don’t want adults around.

These may be simple pieces of advice, but I’m glad someone was willing to share them with me. I’m thankful there are those who have gone through these teen years with girls and can pass on nuggets of truth about what works and what doesn’t. I’m so grateful to have others in my life that understand and stick by me through these challenging years as this mom learns to let go.

So, whether you are a mom to daughters or involved in girls’ ministry by choice or default, I’m right there with you!