I look back and wonder, "what was I thinking?!" Somehow in raising my three girls and being involved in girls' ministry I thought is was going to be about an eight or ten year process. Now I am thinking this could be more along the lines of a marathon, not 26 miles, but 26 years!

It really is a 24/7 commitment. So much of the girls' ministry I'm involved in is outside of the official programs of my church. I'm finding that more and more girls' ministry for me happens at the gym, at school, ball games, and in my kitchen. It is wherever girls are. And I'm sure the same is true for you.

As I've been pondering the past few years and the years to come, I keep wondering if I am really up for it. This is going to be a haul if I stick with these girls...my girls and all their friends. I keep thinking about marathon training, and I am NOT a runner of any kind.

In the marathon of the Christian life and Christian ministry there are a variety of competitors. Some are like jack rabbits; they start off strong and fast, but burn out quickly. There are those who spend too much time talking and laughing with the other participants. For them, it is just one big party and after awhile, they lose sight of actually ever finishing the race. Others spend their race focusing on the cramp in their foot, the ailment in their hip, last year's injury that still hasn't healed properly. Their focus becomes the problem of the moment rather than the finish line.

Others get so caught up in their sportswear and how they look that they forget there is a race to run. There are the overly competitive who are too concerned with how everyone else is racing. They spend all of their time and energy watching those around them, measuring themselves against their competition...their goal becomes more about others than attaining the prize for themselves. When was the last time you compared your girls' ministry with someone else's ministry?

The super athletic, the elite performers...everyone has an eye on them. (The mega church ministries maybe?) Yet, they can mistakenly make the race all about working and performing in their own strength and by the power of their resources. Unfortunately, in the marathon of the Christian life, hard work ethic or lots of money or resources just doesn't cut it. 

So, in the end, which competitors cross the finish line and attain the prize?

It's those that adequately prepared and trained by getting up day after day, consistently putting in hours of training...not because they wanted to beat everyone else, but because they were looking forward to running the race and into the arms of their Savior. It's those that were encouraged along the way by the cheers of their friends, yet didn't get sidetracked by their friends. It's those who kept their focus on Christ and not on the cramps and ailments--tempted...but did not quit for the temporary comfort. Their eyes were on the Eternal One.

It is those that buckled down and endured the torturous hills, knowing the One to be gained in pain was most worthy of the cost. It is those who weren't afraid to go it alone because they knew that the prize at the finish was better than any temporal fellowship they might have along the way. It is those who haven't poured all their resources into what is wasting away; but instead, focused on the unseen imperishables. It is those that don't pridefully try to do it on their own, but realize the power is really in their weakness. Letting go of their own ability, their Father infuses them with His strength and carries them across the finish line.

Girls' ministry really is like a marathon. It is 24/7 and it may take us 26 years or longer as we invest in the lives of girls and young women. But like the marathon runners who finally cross the finish line, this girls' ministry marathon is going to be worth it.  

Where is your girls' ministry? What kind of competitor are you? 

I’ve spent a lot of time at the movies lately. Here’s what I saw and my thoughts about those films:

Something Borrowed [PG-13]: This movie, based on a chick-lit book by the same title, was an emotional roller coaster. You see the power of friendship, loyalty, and love all tangled up in a love triangle. You’re cheering for the lead character one minute and then wondering how she can be so stupid the next. Though there are several funny and poignant moments, I can’t condone the movie’s endorsement of premarital sex, partying, crude humor, or language. And I really struggled with its message that everyone just deserves to be happy, and that nothing should stand in the way of that. Bottom line: I can’t recommend this movie to you or your girls, but it may be a good conversation starter.

Bridesmaids [R]: With all the hype around this movie, I thought I should check it out. Admittedly, I’m a big Kristen Wiig fan, but I discovered that I can only take her in small doses, like in the skits on SNL. There were so many drawn-out awkward moments in this movie that I kept wishing the director had said “cut!” a little sooner.  This movie featured a few laugh-out-loud moments, but many of them were based on inappropriate subjects. The language is especially offensive, and honestly, the story line was a little more emotional than I bargained for. I thought I was in for Kristen Wiig and the other funny ladies in this film’s special brand of humor—nonstop. But honestly, it’s a tale of losing your best friend, feeling replaced, and hitting rock bottom, with several awkward sex scenes (but no nudity, thankfully!) and gut-wrenching confrontations thrown in. Definitely not what I expected . . . and it isn’t one I’d recommend for you or your girls—as if the rating wasn’t enough to tell you that already!

Courageous [NR]. I think Pam’s post a few days ago perfectly summed up how I feel about this movie. Yes, it’s from the same folks who did Facing the Giants and Fireproof. Thankfully, they have continued to improve as they’ve continued to make movies. This movie, while still using some of the same familiar faces you’ve seen in their previous flicks, has better acting and even some believable action scenes. There are heart-wrenching moments (yes, I cried!), laugh-out-loud scenes, and some plot twists. I think this one could have a major impact on men across the country and there should be a mandatory viewing for all fathers. If only! This is definitely a movie you should plan to see.

His Girl
Based on the book Your Girl: Raising a Godly Daughter in an Ungodly World by Vicki Courtney

Have you ever wished a girl in your ministry could see herself the way God sees her so that she’d start living differently? We’ve got a study she needs to see.

His Girl is a magazine-style Bible study for teen girls that will help them understand and believe that they are God’s girl. When girls see themselves from His point of view, they can face this crazy world and live with newfound faith and freedom. They can take a stand in what they do, what they believe about themselves, how they respond to sexual pressure, how they dress, whom and how they date, and how they interact with other girls. They can be His girls—confident young women who base their self-worth in who they are in Christ and follow Him with abandon. (You can check out a sample of His Girl here.)

Have you enjoyed leading girls through this study? Please leave a comment and let us know your thoughts on His Girl.

On this day nine years ago, I married the love of my life.

We exchanged our vows in front of a small crowd in a large sanctuary, complete with stained glass windows, red carpet, and a taper candle that just wouldn't stand straight.

There wasn't anything really remarkable about the ceremony, except for the pastor's illustration of the Energizer Bunny to point out that marriage is a covenant meant to last an eternity (no, I wasn't expecting that).

The last nine years, however, have been anything but usual. In that time, we've...

• buried two parents and a sibling
• grieved the loss of three grandparents
• said goodbye to two dogs and two fish
• faced infertility
• endured and completed the process for international adoption (for which any family should receive a purple heart!)
• grieved over one failed adoption
• adopted the most beautiful, clever, intelligent, hysterical child EVER (no bias, really)
• brought home a prone-to-chew-on-everthing-including-my-undergarments dog with enough energy to power a small country
• faced depression
• undergone three surgeries (that I can count) and overcame uncounted sinus infections, sprained toes, wounded knees, and other illnesses (including a stomach illness that involved yogurt)
• endured five principal changes (him) and five supervisor changes (me)
• experienced the ecstacy and the agony of being Alabama football fans
• traveled to countless states, taught countless conferences, counseled countless people, stayed in countless less-than-sterile hotels, motels, and lodges
• crashed one car and bought another
• laughed together at private jokes, funny situations, and stupid things we've done 

And the students Jim and I teach, mentor, and share life with have watched us through every single minute of it.  We've voiced our prayers in Sunday School, discipleship groups, and in worship. We've talked about the joys and struggles, arguments and funny moments. Even when we didn't realize it, we were demonstrating how a believer can experience life at its best and at its worst.

Whether you are married or not, the lesson of this blog entry is simple—how you live matters. The girls in your church, your school, and your home see how you respond to life, whether it's a major death in your family or how you treat your dog. Your life, in whatever stage and in whatever situation, is a living sketch of God's face intersecting with human experience.

My prayer for my marriage—and for you—is that the picture is a good one.

 Some of you may have already seen this short clip, but I thought it was worth showing. It is all about the power of words and is something I've needed to be reminded of lately with Girls' Ministry. 

Words are important. They can encourage or discourage. They can build up or tear down. They can impart wisdom or foolishness. They can help change a young girl's life for better or worse. 

Although we may not always realize it, what we say and how we say it matters. You really do make a difference when you speak.

What messages are you sharing with the girls in your ministry? 

I just walked back into my office.

I am holding a wet, mascara-laden kleenex.

My eyes are blotchy, but my heart is full.

I have just watched a showing of the new film Couragous.

I went into the room with relatively low expectations. I liked the first two films produced by this team—Facing the Giants and Fireproof. I enjoyed them, but they did not move me.

This one did.

As I was watching the film, I couldn't help but think of the potential of the message that thousands—and hopefully millions—of people will hear when it releases on the big screen on September 30th. It has the potential to change lives, families, and communities.

And it has the potential to speak to the hearts of a generations of girls and their dads.

I'm not writing this blog because the company I work for is working to promote it. I am not writing this blog because I am being encouraged to do so by friends, colleagues or supervisors. I am teling you about it because it is an excellent movie with an inspiring, challenging, and biblical message.

Here's a sneak peek of the movie:

Check out more information about Courageous on its website. And then go circle the date on your calendar. Plan a family outing around it. Encourage other families to go. Offer scholarships for people who can't afford it. Ask your church to purchase a showing and buy up the tickets so you can give them to friends and family. Do whatever you can to get people to see Courageous—the message is that important.

I wish my dad could have watched this movie when I was growing up. Don't let this generation of fathers  miss it, too.

It is that time of year...one of the busiest for girls' ministry and student ministry. Summer. School is out and students are looking for things to do. Girls in your ministry may be busy with sports or band practicies. They may be busy with summer jobs. But all of them find a little free time in the midst of their "busy schedules!" 

What are you planning or preparing to help them stay challenged spiritually this summer? 

Maybe I'm a little partial since I accepted Christ at a youth camp, but camps are one of the best ways to help students make life-changing decisions. One week away from the normal environment focused on God can make all the difference. 

Fuge Promo from LifeWay Student on Vimeo.

We would love to hear about your plans for the summer. What you are planning for your girls and how do you help them grow spiritually during the summer months when they want their brains to have a break?

So, tell us, what are you doing this summer with the girls in your ministry? Ever thought about going to camp?! Click here to find out more about LifeWay's Fuge Camps! Or tell us if you are already a FUGE FAN!

As school winds down and students gear up for summer, we’re here to keep you informed about the world they live in . . .

Here’s the music that most of them are listening to:

1.     “Rolling In The Deep” by Adele

2.     “E.T.” by Katy Perry

3.     “On The Floor” by Jennifer Lopez feat. Pitbull

4.     “Just Can’t Get Enough” by The Black Eyed Peas

5.     “The Lazy Song” by Bruno Mars

6.     “Till The World Ends” by Britney Spears

7.     “Just a Kiss” by Lady Antebellum

8.     “Give me Everything” by Pitbull feat. Ne-Yo, AfroJack, and Nayer

9.     “S&M” by Rihanna

10.  “Look at Me Now” by Chris Brown, feat. Lil Wane and Busta Rhymes

This past weekend, I saw Water for Elephants [rated PG-13]. It’s a gritty, yet pretty, movie, and fairly clean, too. Language-wise, at least. There is some sexually suggestive material (including allusions to premarital/adulterous sex), but no nudity (although there are some scenes and a few circus acts/outfits that get VERY close). Some scenes, mostly dealing with the violent temper tantrums of the circus owner, are hard to watch, whether he’s beating his wife or one of his animals. I wasn’t sure what to expect, as I hadn’t read the book yet, but I thought the movie was well done. I’m not saying the themes of infidelity, violence, and revenge are right, however. For a more in-depth review from a Christian perspective, go here.

Also, are the cicadas out in full force in your neck of the woods, too? There are places in Nashville where the cicadas are blanketing the ground. Gross. (Or beautiful, according to one of the girls in my small group who informed me last night that she loves cicadas because she thinks they’re pretty. I’m glad someone likes cicadas!) I’ve decided that if they’re not blind, then they must be some of the dumbest bugs on the planet. Today, I saw one crash into a parked car. And based on the (fast and ever-dependable) Internet research I just did, they are not blind. So that means they’re just not smart. Or at least, they aren’t very good at flying. But they're here, and they're loud, so I guess I'm just going to have to learn to deal. :) After all, it doesn't SOUND like summer until the cicadas are buzzing.

Woven: A retreat for teen girls

Tired of the cliques in your ministry?

Woven is a five-session Bible study for teen girls that focuses on unity. This product, which is designed to be used in a retreat setting, addresses the importance of harmony within a student group and among Christian believers of all ages. It focuses on a topic that all girls wrestle with—social groups. Each session ends with a section that allows students to weave in their own story to the biblical truth, making application in their personal lives. You can check out a sample here.

Woven: A Retreat for Teen Girls – Kit  contains everything you need to carry out a retreat with a group of teen girls. This resource includes guidance for a 5-session Bible study that provides a variety of learning activities including quizzes, fill-in-the-blanks, checklists, and other activities geared at tapping into girls' unique learning styles. The kit includes:
    * 10 student books
    * Leader’s Guide
    * Promotional posters
    * CD-ROM with extra features such as logos for printing t-shirts or other special gifts, Web links, PowerPoint® presentations, and bonus ideas for small churches, large budgets, and sizes in between.

Leave a comment below if you’ve used this study. We’d love to know what you thought!

As you read from your Bible each day, keep in mind that these words - heart, soul, mind and strength - are not clear cut categories. There seems to be some overlap with the meanings, yet, when listed together, they communicate the need to love the Lord with absolutely all that we are. 

As we look at loving Him with all our strength today, we will consider strength as the ability, gifts, and energy that God gives us. Worthy is our God to receive love demonstrated though all the effort of our being, all the work of our hands!

Take a few moments to read Mark 12:30, Deuteronomy 6:4-9, 1 Peter 4:7-11, and 1 Timothy 1:12.

How can we love Him more deeply with our strength? 

We show that we love Him when we do what He tells us to do. We must never stop praying, never stop asking, never stop seeking from God what His plans are for us. We must walk step by step with Him each day, acknowledging how quickly we can lose focus of what He has called us to do. Girls' Ministry can be overwhelming at times. We may be tempted to quit or at least to take a break for a while. However, if we love Him, we will obey Him. We will love and care for others. We will do whatever it is that He has called us to do. And all our strength, even in the details of our lives, will be exerted to bring glory to God.

As you think about your time, your energy, your efforts, and your attention today, ask God how you can love Him most with all your strength. Not just with your girls' ministry, but with every part of your life.

Would you be willing to consider a clean slate...removing things that might not be your assignments...committing to something where you have previously held back? 

Write out your prayer, asking God to help you love Him deeply with your strength. Thank Him for giving you strength. Acknowledge that you know that you can do anything He calls you to do, because you believe that He will enable you to do it. Thank Him for drawing you into a deeper love relationship with Him.

Happy Cinco de Mayo to you! Hope you get to enjoy some chips, guacamole, and salsa today, if you're into that sort of thing. (I am!)

Would you mind sharing your opinion with us? We're in the process of planning future Girls' Ministry Forums (next year's Forum is happening at the end of February—hope you're planning to join us!), and are curious as to what time of year is best for you. Please take a second to vote in the poll below.

On the charts

There are a few new songs on the charts this week:

1.     “E.T.” by Katy Perry feat. Kanye West

2.     “Rolling in the Deep” by Adele

3.     “Till the World Ends” by Britney Spears feat. Nicki Minaj and Ke$ha

4.     “Just Can’t Get Enough” by The Black Eyed Peas

5.     “The Lazy Song” by Bruno Mars (I have a feeling this song is going to be the theme song of summer, unfortunately. For more about Bruno Mars’ music, go here and skim down to number 3.)

6.     “S&M” by Rihanna

7.     “On the Floor” by Jennifer Lopez feat. Pitbull

8.     “Blow” by Ke$ha

9.     “Down on Me” by Jeremih feat. 50 Cent

10.  “Look at Me Now” by Chris Brown feat. Lil Wayne and Busta Rhymes (Dumbest. Chorus. Ever.)

Royal Wedding Craze

With Prince William and Kate Middleton (ahem, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge) now married for a week, are your girls still buzzing about it? The royal wedding came up in our small group last night. There are so many ways to steer that conversation: how the wedding was a glimpse into Christianity for unbelievers, how we are the bride of Christ, the sanctity of marriage, and even how a real princess behaves. If that last topic strikes your fancy, check out True Princess, a Bible study on the topic of embracing humility in a world that teaches our girls that life is all about them.

We know as girls' ministry leaders you are busy, but take a few minutes and read the following scriptures:

• Mark 12:29-30
• Matthew 11:28-30
• Psalm 42:1-2
• Psalm 62:5-8
• Isaiah 55:3

How can we love God more deeply with our souls?

How do we demonstrate our deep love for God ith the totality of our beings,  with "all that is within me," and with every breath of life?

The perfect place to start is by responding to His voice when He calls us to come to Him, by opening the door when He knocks, and going away with the One who loves us most.

Time spent in quiet rest with God is essential for our love relationship to thrive. It is during time spent resting with God that we express our great love and gratitude to Him. Here we pour out our hunger and thirsts, our hurts and our struggles. Here we confess and repent of our sins, asking God to help us in our weaknesses. This is the place where He draws us to Himself, where He pours out His great love, forgiveness, mercy, and healing. He speaks with us, instructing us in His ways, and showing us the paths that we should take.

It is God's desire to fellowship with us...that we seek Him, find Him and know Him well. We know from His Word that we are to be like Him, to have His character. 

How can we become like Him unless we give Him more time? 

How can we love Him deeply without finding a place of rest with Him alone?

What in your life distracts you from regularly scheduling times of quiet rest with God? 

Identify and think about these things. Are they (the things that take your time and energy) more important than your relationship with God? Can you effectively do them apart from your relationship with God? 

Write out a prayer today professing your love for God, confessing your distractions, and asking Him to help you reorder your life. Ask Him to help you love Him with all your heart and with all your soul.