Girls Ministry Idea Book

By Jimmie Davis

Are you fresh out of ideas?

It’s easy to run out of steam and creativity when you’re pouring yourself into girls’ ministry. Jimmie Davis pulls from her experience as a girls’ ministry leader, sharing ideas and ministry projects in the Girls' Ministry Idea Book. Fresh, new ideas make this a valuable tool for anyone who works with teen girls. Chapters include ideas that teach spiritual truths, rites of passage, creative prayer ideas, father-daughter and mother-daughter events, ideas to make girls’ ministry special, and much more. Click here to see a sample chapter.

If you’ve read this book, leave a comment and let other readers know what you thought about it!

One of the great things about having summer interns is their fresh perspective on life and ministry. And the fact that they are willing to write blogs for us.

Today's blog comes from one of our summer interns, Alex Rhoades, who finished her work here just in time to go intern at the White House. Yes, I'm sure working here prepared her to handle the pressure of the Oval Office. Thanks, Alex, for serving us here and serving the Lord there.

Rush, big sisters, chapter meetings, philanthropy, hazing, “pledges,” and “actives” are all terms associated with sororities. A staple of college campuses for over a century, the decision whether or not to join a sorority has been faced by almost every female college student. Before you start thinking that this topic does not concern you or your ministry to middle and high school girls, you should know that sororities have expanded outside the collegiate arena: Sororities are now in high schools across the U.S.

Chances are, some of your girls are members of their high school sorority. Most of us understand college sororities (and some of us, including myself, were probably members), but high school sororities differ in some ways. To understand your girls’ sorority experience, here are a few things you should know:

There is a focus on community service.
Many high school sororities require their members to serve a certain number of volunteer hours over the course of a semester or year. Often times, the sorority will arrange group activities, such as serving food at a homeless shelter or working at a nursing home, so that their members can serve the community together. This service provides a great opportunity for you to talk with your girls about Jesus’ call for us to help the poor.

There is hazing.
Though it is traditionally associated with collegiate sororities, hazing is becoming increasingly obsolete on college campuses. Due to harsh state laws and many national sororities taking a “zero tolerance” stance toward any type of hazing, new members of college sororities have found themselves in a safer, friendly environment.

Unlike college, however, high school sororities are not nationally unified, and many students do not understand the legal ramifications of hazing. This lack of knowledge and cohesion has made hazing practically standard in many schools. Thankfully, most of the hazing is harmless and includes things like making new members wear ridiculous amounts of makeup (picture a clown), requiring girls not shave for a week, or making new members wear completely unfashionable outfits. At some schools, the hazing can be much more harmful though. Talk to your girls to understand what type of hazing goes on at their school, and intervene if something you hear seems dangerous.

They focus on building relationships—for only the chosen few.
Every college freshman is given a chance to go through “Rush” (when potential new members learn about each sorority), but at many high schools, not all girls are given a chance to join. Often times, new members are invited into the sorority by invitation only, but there is no formal recruitment where potential new members can express their interest in joining. This creates an atmosphere of “I’m special” for the girls who are invited and “I’m worthless” for the girls who wanted to be invited, but were not. This may not be the case for girls in your ministry, however, because many other high schools actually have sign-ups for those interested. Talk to the girls in your small group to learn which way their high school recruits new girls for sororities, and be supportive of girls dealing with rejection.

It's a very regular thing for me to meet girls in college and seminary who have a passion for girls' ministry. Every so often I talk to one and I think to myself, "she's got it. She understand the heart of girls' ministry." Today's guest blogger, Jennifer, is one of such people. Enjoy her words of encouragement.

Moses had Joshua.

Paul had Timothy.

Batman had Robin.

Who do you have?

I can imagine the emotions that must have stirred within Timothy as he read these words from Paul:

"And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others." 2 Timothy 2:2

Timothy had experienced firsthand the investment of one person's life into another's. He knew the sacrifice that Paul made to teach him so much about Christ, ministry, and life. Paul spoke so sweetly of Timothy to the church at Philippi in Philippians 2:19-24 when he said, "but you know that Timothy has proved himself, because as a son with his father he has served with me in the work of the gospel..." A beautiful description of what discipleship looked like.

Knowing that Tim knew the value of being a protégé, Paul challenges Timothy: "Find one! Find people around you and pour your life into theirs. Show them what it means to walk with Jesus faithfully through this life. Identify those that you can count on to continue this cycle by pouring out what you have poured in."

Within my own life I have seen this truth in all its glory.

As a freshman in college I was surrounded by wonderful upperclassmen who poured into my life. I was challenged to commit to leading a Bible study on a floor of freshman girls during my sophomore year. I gladly stepped up and had the privilege of serving 15-20 girls on a weekly basis through the study of the Word. I was overjoyed at the end of that year when two of my girls took the challenge of "taking over" when I moved out of the dorm. They continued on with new freshmen the following year. Two of their girls have now stepped up to again carry on for this coming year to the new students who will fill the dorms. Oh the beauty!

I cannot help but wonder if part of the chronic disobedience that the Israelites experienced after deliverance into the Promise Land was because Joshua didn't have someone to pour into. Moses trained Joshua in the knowledge of Yahweh and equipped Joshua to carry on after Moses had passed (Deut. 3:28). Yet Scripture mentioned nothing about Joshua raising up a young man to take the reins. I'm sure the people would have continued to disobey, but there is something to be said about the longing in our hearts to follow someone who has proved to be trustworthy and faithful.

Who are your Joshua's? Who are your Timothy's? Who can you pour into that will in turn pour into others? Are you reproducing reproducers?

I challenge you to make 1 Corinthians 11:1 the true cry of your heart as you seek to lead young women in pursuit of the King...

"Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ."

Trust me, they will follow.

 

Jennifer surrendered her life to Christ at a young age but determined not to let her life become complacent. As a high school student she fell in love with reading, studying, and memorizing the word of God, a love that carried over into her college years when, as a freshman, she felt a call to ministry. She is a Biblical Studies major at Palm Beach Atlantic University. She loves coffee, thunderstorms, and chocolate chip ice cream.

Armed with my trusty smart phone, I snuck into the arena of publishing, where the newest girls’ Bible study, James: Faith Under Pressure, is concurrently being edited and designed. Without the knowledge or consent of the graphic designer (she’d probably kill me!), I snapped a couple of pictures to share with you. I can’t wait for girls to dig into God’s Word through this study. Until then…

School has begun here in Tennessee, and with a girl in our house, that means one thing: drama. And she’s just in the first grade.

With the launch of a new school years, girls will face or be confronted by any number of issues, from gossip to alcoholism to gender confusion. To help you learn about these issues and to give you some tools for dealing with them, we’re offering a special video broadcast August 30 at noon C.S.T.  via a link here (click on view stream). You can also preregister, which I highly recommend, and you'll receive an email reminder.

This Web cast features two of my favorite people, partners and colleagues in girl world. Sissy Goff and Melissa Trevathan work in the trenches as professional counselors who specialize in girls' issues at Daystar Counseling Ministries. They possess the rare combination of a passion for girls and a passion for Christ, which create a unique skill set when applied to their professional training. They’re the authors of several books for and about girls, parenting, and the like. Their most recent project, “Raising Boys and Girls: Understanding Their Unique Differences” releases in a couple of months.

 

 

I’ll be moderating this discussion, offering up questions for them to answer. But I don’t want to be the one formulating the questions—I want you to provide them. If you could sit across the table from them, what would you ask them? What do you want to know about when it comes to girls and the issues they face? Comment below!

 

Table for Two: Doing Life and Savoring Scripture Together
By Amy Pierson and Mona Corwin

This one’s a money-saver.

Table for Two is two products in one. Use it as a mentoring tool and as a tool to teach girls a basic way to study the Bible for themselves. Instead of spoon-feeding truth to girls, leaders will be equipped and challenged to lead girls to explore and discover principles in God’s Word for themselves. As girls begin to study Scripture for themselves, they become less dependent on a leader. This book can be used in a variety of settings, including mother-daughter encounters, ministry within sororities, intergenerational discipleship, and/or small groups. If you’re looking for a product that can help you mentor girls (or to give to other females who are in a mentoring relationship), then Table for Two is a great option. It really sets the framework for one-on-one discipleship. To see an excerpt for yourself, please click here.

If you’ve used Table for Two, leave a comment and let us know what you think about it!

Calling all fathers of tween girls. On second thought, calling everyone who works with tweens.

I've got a great book for you to read. Yes, I want you to read. I promise, if you have any connection to tween girls, you'll fly through these pages.

The book is called "What Happened to My Little Girl: Dad's Ultimate Guide to His Tween Daughter." It's written by Nancy Rue (with Jim Rue), who has written a volume of books about and for tween and teen girls. This one gives insight into that confusing, anxiety-inducing, sleepless-night-producing Twilight Zone called the preteen years. Chapter titles include:

Can Somebody Tell Me What's Going On? (I wonder that all the time, and my daughter hasn't even hit that age group yet!)

What Happened to My Little Girl?

She'll Be Crying in a Minute

We Need Another Bathroom

Who Is She Today?

Dealing with Girl Drama

I Liked It Better When Boys Had Cooties

What I like most about this book is the author's ingenius idea to include quotes from these mysterious creatures themselves. Scattered generously throughout the book, these words are so powerful that just reading those alone would be reason enough to purchase the book. Here's just a few samples of what girls wanted to tell their dads (and us):

"My daddy doesn't really, really know who I am. I'm not even sure I know who I really, reallyl am."

"I can talk to my dad about everything. Well...almost everything. I can talk about everything with my mom but some things—you know, those things, I can't talk about with my dad. It would be way too embarrassing."

"My dad is a really great guy and I know he loves me. But I've never really trusted him with my feelings because he yells at me a lot."

"I wish my dad spent more time with me and gave me more attention. Last night he told my brother a story. He spent like twenty minutes by him and two minutes by me. Unfair is a word I'm familiar with."

"Sometimes I wish that my dad would WANT to talk about my friends, but he never seems that interested."

and my favorite:

"My dad talks to me about boys. He says he'll kick the butt of the first guy who asks me out."

The quotes above don't even skim the surface of the jewels you'll find in this book. Take it from me—I was a preteen girl once (a very, very long time ago), and I wish this book were in print when I was that age.

Dads, go get this book. Right now. Really. Turn off your computer right now, drive to the bookstore, and get this book. You'll thank me later...and your daughter will think you've become brilliant overnight.

Today is a day of lasts. It’s the last time I’ll get together with my LifeGroup girls before they head to college. It’s the last time we’ll all be together to talk and laugh and encourage and love on each other before they go off on the big freshman adventure. I’m really excited about what God is doing in each of their lives and pray that we keep in touch so I can hear all about what He will do in the future.

Like those soon-to-be-college freshmen, I too am heading back to school this fall. So this is my last day in the office at LifeWay. And this is my last post on this blog. It’s been an incredible five years here, and it’s extremely bittersweet to be leaving this place and these people who’ve loved and encouraged me as I spent my first years in the real world after college. I’ve learned so much . . . I can’t even begin to put it all into words!

And while my passion is still for girls and ministering to them, my focus looks a little different than most of yours. I am headed to law school this fall with hopes to become a legal advocate for victims of human trafficking, specifically those in sexual slavery. It’s been a long journey to decide to leave this job in order to start from scratch, but I know that I cannot stand by while this injustice rages on.

Psalm 10:17-18 has become my battle cry:

“LORD, You have heard the desire of the humble; You will strengthen their hearts. You will listen carefully, doing justice for the fatherless and the oppressed so that men of the earth may terrify them no more.” 

As I prepare to start law school, it’s my prayer that those verses will keep me focused on why I’m there. I know that the road God is leading me down as a modern-day abolitionist is scary (because so much of it is unknown), but when you sense that He’s leading you, there is peace and excitement that makes the journey so worth it.

So farewell, faithful blog readers! I covet your prayers, not just for me, but also for those precious women and children who are in slavery.

If you’re interested in learning more about the fight against human trafficking and sexual slavery, check out the following links:

International Justice Mission

Abolition International

Apne Aap

Shared Hope

Stop Child Trafficking Now

Somaly Mam Foundation

What do you do when a girl makes a poor choice? When a girl you've poured into decides to reject what she's learned? When a girl lies to you and you find out?

If you haven't faced this conundrum in ministry, just wait. It will happen.

In this video blog, girls' minister and speaker Courtney Veasey shares her own story. Hopefully it will encourage you and prepare you as you work with girls.

If I didn't know it before, last night confirmed that we often have way too much time on our hands in my house. School has started for one of my daughters, but the other two don't start until later this week. We are in that "inbetween" stage where we are trying to figure out the schedule and routine, but can't quite get there. Because there is no way they are going to jump into school mode until they absolutely have to.

After dinner while the one was doing homework, the rest started flipping through channels. I was in and out of the room doing laundry, dishes, and other assorted household tasks that everyone else ignores. (Yes, you can sense the bitter tone!)

At one point I walked in the den and actually sat down and then practically yelled, "What is that?!" They had landed on a program called "Hillbilly Hand Fishing." The name itself would lead me to change the channel if I ever had control of the remote. (Because you know these days we forget that you can actually walk up to the front of a TV and still change the channel! And yes, again the bitter tone because I never have control of the remote.)

These people were in muddy, disgusting water up to their necks...and they were finding holes under the dirty water where catfish make their homes. The people would find the hole with their feet or hands, then one would grab the catfish while the other would string it. They would yank it up out of the water, everyone would look at the ugly fish, pat each other on the back, and then release it.

At this point I had to comment, "Seriously! Why would anyone want to do this?" My husband was quick to point out that six of the eight people had actually paid for this wonderful excursion experience.

You have got to be kidding....

What is the point of my ranting? Well, I learned several things from my 20 minutes of educational, enriching television experience (yes, there is that bitter tone again), but actually a few things that apply to girls' ministry and student ministry.

1. People have a lot of interesting talents. I suppose hand fishing is one of those. Not everyone can do it, and obviously, some people have a passion for hand fishing while others do not. Am I looking for the interesting (and possibly sometimes odd talents) in those around me? How can one girl's "talent" be used for God? How can that student serve God with his or her unique gifts?

2. People are looking for adventure. Why would anyone get in muddy, filthy water, find holes that they can't see with their feet and hands, and grab a catfish only to let it go? Adventure? A once-in-a-lifetime experience? (Or at least I hope only a once-in-a-lifetime experience.) How can we make sure our girls' ministry, our student ministry, or our church shares the joy, the thrill, and the adventure of the abundant life with Christ? How can we support the once-in-a-lifetime decisions and help them grow?

3. People like a challenge. The six people who paid for the hillbilly hand fishing excursion were from all walks of life and had different reasons for enduring this experience. They each wanted to try something new, overcome a fear, or fight for the accomplishment. How do present the gospel, the Christian adventure, in such a way that others want this "something new" for their lives? How do we help believers and non-believers to trust God with their fears? How do we emphasize the positives of the challenge of the Christian walk and the great sense of accomplishment when one overcomes temptations and trials and lives in obedience to Christ?

Although I learned several more life applications from watching Hillbilly hand fishing, those were my top three...oh, and...my family has way too much time on their hands! 

Hannah’s One Wish
By Kelly Minter

Do you ever wish your girls would be really honest and open up about what’s on their hearts and minds? We’ve got a study that promotes honesty—by looking at one woman in the Bible, as well as several modern day girls, who are gut-wrenchingly honest with themselves and with God.

Hannah’s One Wish is an interactive 8-week Bible study for teen girls that focuses on the story of Hannah in 1 Samuel. Girls will meet Hannah - a devout woman of God who wrestled with her share of problems. She, too, faced enemies who taunted her, questioned God's sovereignty, wondered why the wicked were allowed to prosper, and did her best to be honest before God. This study also features stories written by teen girls who have wrestled with many of the same core struggles Hannah faced. If you'd like to see a sample of this study, please click here.

Have you led girls through Hannah’s One Wish? If so, leave us a comment and let us know what you thought!

Interesting summer...

My home has been a revolving door for girls ages 10-18. With three daughters ages 16, 14, and 10 it is just what happens especially during the summer months. On any given day I'm not sure how many "extras" will be eating or spending the night. Well, I do set some guidelines, but it is summer after all!

Last week I returned from Belize and a mission trip, once again surrounded by girls. We had eleven teenage girls ages 14-19 on the trip with the total group of 29. (One of the 14-year-olds was my daughter!) I taught and facilitated Bible studies for teen girls and women all week in addition to some other ministry opportunities in the village where my church partners with the missionaries and a local pastor.

The main thing I've been reminded of during this interesting summer is that girls are girls regardless of age, nationality, ethnicity, or economic status. The girls in my kitchen talk about many of the same issues that the girls in Belize were concerned about - boys, self-image, God, His ways and what it means to really live out your faith.

The girls want to talk and just need people who will listen, really listen. They need people who will encourage and affirm them. People who will believe in them. People who will challenge them to take a chance. People who will dare them to be who God created them to be.

They need women in their lives who will discuss the difficulties of being a woman in a culture that presents a spectrum of womanhood that is sometimes founded on godly principles and sometimes not.

Summer is a great time to gather girls and get them ready for the school year ahead. They live by the cyclical school calendar and are ready to step into new skin with the start of the school year. There is an element of hope and anticipation that something new and exciting will happen this year. Maybe even something life-changing!

One of my challenges to the girls in and out of my home and the girls in Belize this summer is to really live as a disciple of Jesus this next year. Four challenges came out of my summer ministry to girls.

1. With each new day, live following and obeying Jesus in everything.

2. Look to Him for answers to your questions.

3. Seek Him when you need comfort and peace in a situation.

4. Commit to Him and trust Him to give you the new, fresh perspective on life and restoration as a new season begins.

My summer has probably been a lot like those of you in Girls' Ministry and Student Ministry. Not really a bad way to spend your summer...

Gathering girls....scattering disciples.