What If I Blow It?
In the November 2009 issue of ParentLife, Bob Bunn, editor of Living With Teenagers, sets out to help you establish boundaries to help your preteen flourish by talking about healthy discipline. Every parent has messed up in the area of discipline before. So what do you do if you make a discipline mistake? Here is what Bob has to say!
What If I Blow It?
You are going to mess up discipline at some point. You will get angry when you should be operating with a calm spirit or the consequences you deal out will be more extreme than the action deserves. So what happens when you blow it? Here are three ideas drawn from research and personal experience.
- Apologize. If you stepped out of line with an adult, you probably would not have much trouble admitting it and asking forgiveness. Adopt that same attitude with your preteen. You are not perfect, and she does not expect you to be. So do the right thing and apologize. In addition to rebuilding the relationship, showing a humble spirit in this way provides a great lesson for your child in her future relationships.
- Determine what you will do differently next time. If your original attempt falls flat, think through your missteps and determine a better way to approach the situation. You probably have heard it said that people do not plan to fail, they just fail to plan. When it comes to mistakes in discipline, make sure you plan for a better future.
- Do it! It is one thing to create a strategy, but if you never put it into practice, it does not do any good. Be intentional and stick with your plan.
Have you ever had to aplogize to your preteen for a mistake you made? What discipline struggles do you face as the parent of a preteen?
