Mom, Can We Have a Dog?
Dr. Linda Mintle answers your questions each month in the Real Life Solutions department of ParentLife magazine. This month Dr. Linda answers questions about kids using cell phones and when kids lie. Each month we post an extra question on the blog. This month Dr. Mintle gives some advice about getting a pet.
Q: Our 10-year-old daughter is begging us for a pet. I have two younger children and adding a pet to the mix feels overwhelming. However, my daughter desperately wants a pet and I am an animal lover. I am not sure about the added responsibility right now. What should we consider in making this decision?
A: Most children will beg you for a pet some time in their young lives. The main issues to consider are the child’s developmental stage and your expectations for taking care of a pet. Obviously a cat or dog would require care and attention — feeding, grooming, exercise, clean up, and more. Other pets, such as fish and guinea pigs, are less time and care intensive and good choices for younger children. They offer you an opportunity to see how committed to taking care of a pet your child really is and how long interest will be sustained.
Go to the library and get a book about pet care. As a family, talk about the needs of a pet, what type of pet you may consider, and what the expectations would be. For example, certain dog breeds are more kid-friendly than others. Goldfish or hermit crab requires very little upkeep and expense. Visit a pet store and talk with a friend who has the kind of pet you are interested in to get a better idea of time and care issues.
Of course your child could lose interest in the pet after several weeks and you may end up with the responsibility. Schedule playdates with a friend who has a pet and see if the interest in the pet sustains over time. Decide what you can handle right now and do not be swayed by the begging.
Finally, consider the cost of owning a pet, family stability in terms of moves and housing, the demand of time and energy, and the possibility of the pet becoming a source of family conflict if people slack off on their responsibilities. The benefits of pet owning should be considered as well. Pets help teach a child structure, empathy, compassion, nurturing, loyalty, trust, and responsibility and provide companionship. Pets are also sources of unconditional love and dependability. Pets can improve mood and blood pressure, increase family exercise, and even reduce stress.
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Comments (1)
We recently added a pet to our family. We have not had a family pet and for many years our son, 8 years old, begged for a dog. He even used such reasoning as "Dogs are man's best friend, and I am a boy, so I NEED a dog." We researched and spent over a year making the decision of whether or not to add a dog to our family.
We adopted our puppy in January, and though she is a lot of work, mostly for me as the mom, she has also brought a lot of joy and laughter to our family. We know that she will be a part of our family for a long time and we are excited to experience all of the joys of pet ownership.
Posted on March 22, 2010 3:44 PM