March 2011 Archives
Jodi Skulley-March 31, 2011-
In our April issue, we featured the article, "Keep It Fresh! The Dangers of Spoiling Your Children" by Carrie Bevell Partridge. The article has some great advice on breaking the cycle of spoiling, but to help us understand it more fully, here are lists of the WHYS and WAYS we spoil.
Why You Spoil Your Child
- Not wanting her to dislike you
- Fearing tantrums, which will embarrass you
- Wanting to have a happy child, which makes you look like a “good parent”
- Wanting to give her things to help her enjoy life
- Wanting to keep her quiet or to eliminate conflict
- Being too lazy to discipline
- Fearing saying “No” to a sick child
- Having an “I never had ... so my kids will have everything” attitude
- Convenience
- Wanting her to have what other children have
- Wanting her to be well-liked or to fit in with peers
- Wanting to be a “cool” parent
- Feeling guilty for not spending enough time with her
- Wanting to build her self-esteem
Ways You Spoil Your Child
- Always letting her have whatever she wants, whenever she wants
- Never saying “No” and meaning it
- Not giving her any experience in working or waiting
- Not challenging her on thoughts or actions
- Allowing her to dictate what she will eat at meals
- Giving her certain items just because “everyone has them”
- Being her friend instead of her parent
- Putting her needs ahead of your spouse’s needs on an ongoing basis
- Continually bailing her out when she gets in trouble, makes poor decisions, or is irresponsible
- Dropping everything to listen to her when she demands it
- Allowing her to treat you as her servant
Do you think these are accurate? What would add or take away?
**Remember, this is the last day to enter the March giveaway!
Photo by Tammra McCauley; used with permission of Flickr Creative Commons. Click on photo for source.
William Summey-March 30, 2011-
This week I attended a meeting about transitioning kids into middle school. Yikes, middle school! Does that bring up not so pleasant memories for you as it does for me? There aren't many people I know who talk about the middle school years without thinking of the difficult moments.As I listened in that meeting, the speaker shared that one of the best things you can instill in your kids is a sense of resiliency, dealing with disappoitment and loss and moving forward. And I have to agree. Too many times it is easy to cover up issues rather than deal with them, pretend you are not hurting, or avoid conflicts altogether.
This reminder of building resiliency is a good one not only for middle schoolers but also for parents too. How do you say you deal with problems? Difficult times are going to come. Preparing your kids for them takes a lot of work.
Here are some ways to help build resilency that I thought of while reflecting on that middle school meeting.
- Model yourself how to deal with disappointment.
- Admit when you deal with things badly.
- Ask forgiveness when you mess up.
- Talk openly your disappointment with trusted confidants.
- Realize that is OK to feel the disappointment or loss. Don't cover up the pain.
- Address issues that arise when your emotions are in check but without putting aside for too long.
- Don't let fear determine your behavior. Recognize that it does take courage to get back on the horse!
- Pray to God for clear direction. Praise Him always for His goodness and thank Him for His blessings!
What other ideas would you add to the list?
Jodi Skulley-March 29, 2011-
There is just something special about a week away from everything normal and familiar. Many Christians say times when God spoke most clearly along their spiritual journey were retreats or camps. God uses these away-from-home experiences in a big way. Why not start at a time when most kids make a decision to follow Christ or begin to own their faith? Going strong for 10 years, CentriKid staff teams are made up of more and more college students who had their own lives changed through CentriKid!
Camp Basics
CentriKid camps provide a five-day, four-night camp for church groups with children who have completed grades 3 through 6. Churches bring kids and chaperones, but CentriKid staffers take care of all the preparation and programming. If your church has never brought a group, you can start with your own child and yourself. Most CentriKid sites are small college campuses or conference centers. Groups are separated by church into dorms, hotel-style rooms, or other campus housing. Each church makes their own rooming assignments.
A Typical Day
In the morning, kids are introduced to “Quiet Time” where they spend time alone with God. “I Can’t Wait!” kicks off the day, getting everyone up, moving, and ready for the day. Kids go straight to “Team Time,” where they experience creative presentations of biblical truths and play fun games.
In the afternoon, kids pick their favorite activities — pool games, archery, soccer, art, cooking, and more. After “Hang Time” and dinner, the entire camp worships together. Church groups have time to connect back with just their group. The day ends with a fun party – where campers compete to win games on stage. After the party, kids are wiped out from the day, and it is lights out!
Chances are, your child will come home saying, “I wish I could have stayed another week!”
Adult Involvement
What about adults? Some call it a vacation! Adults get their share of late nights and early mornings, but they can focus on their main responsibility, investing in their kids. CentriKid even provides a refreshing time of Bible study and worship just for adults, called “Adult Gathering.”
CentriKid Promises
Consider four promises CentriKid is committed to provide.
- A safe place — physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Many parents say that safety is their biggest concern in sending a child to camp. At CentriKid, campers are supervised every hour of the day. Church groups sign off that all of their adults have completed background checks, and CentriKid staff complete a vigorous hiring process. Campers are encouraged to ask questions, share struggles, and begin to own their faith.
- Age-specific teams. CentriKid Camps recognize that a third grader learns in a much different way than a sixth grader, and groups are planned accordingly. Campers are placed on teams with kids their own age and with staffers who are passionate about effectively teaching the Bible to kids!
- Ministry through relationships. Kids are bound to meet lots of friends and great role models at camp. The students who serve at camp embrace their role in building relationships with kids ... they learn kids’ names; hang out with them; and have conversations about sports, school, friends, and God!
- Kid-friendly programming. CentriKid embraces the latest technology, executes each piece of camp with excellence, and makes everything an experience for kids — because connecting with kids on their level is a top priority and a promise to parents.
Homesickness Tips
- Try a test run. Let your camper stay at a grandparent’s house or with a trusted friend. Having been away from home before, he is likely to do better at camp.
- Talk about the details. Go over the schedule and what you will be up to. Many kids do not want to miss what is happening back home!
- Set ground rules for calling. CentriKid recommends that campers call home once per day. Many churches have a “no call” policy except in case of emergency. In this case, parents call the church for updates from camp, and campers are not even tempted to call home.
- Encourage your camper. All too often, parents can cause homesickness without realizing it. Let go. Enjoy watching your child take one more step toward growing up.
- Label each item that goes to camp — every shirt, sock, and sandal!
- Expect clothes to come home dirty ... and some to not make it home at all.
- Plan each day’s outfit. Pack each one in a labeled gallon-size bag.
- Kids love to have money for the camp store, snacks, and missions offering. CentriKid recommends $25.
- Pack an easy-to-read Bible that your child will be comfortable reading and using in Bible study.
CentriKid Information
Visit www.lifeway.com/centrikid to see the 2011 camp locations, request more information, or register for camp! As a parent, you can even preview a day of camp as a guest of CentriKid at no cost to you.
Do you have plans for your kids to attend a camp this summer?
Meredith Teasley works as a Camp Specialist for CentriKid Camps planning camp year-round. She and her husband, Nic, live in Nashville, Tennessee and are active members at Grace Community Church. They love volunteering with 3rd-6th graders. Meredith blogs at www.meredithteasley.com.
Photo used with permission of Flickr Creative Commons. Click on photo for source.
Jodi Skulley-March 28, 2011-
In the April 2011 issue, we feature Jennifer Shaw, a musician who went through a troubling time. Here's some more of her story about her son Toby's battle with a Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD).
____________________ SPD is a dysfunction of the brain in which sensory signals from the body (vision, auditory, touch, olfaction, and taste) are not processed normally by the brain. For Toby, any touch was received by his brain as hurting. “Food in his mouth hurt. Droplets of water hurt,” Jennifer explains. “Clothing felt intolerable. These children go into survival mode and they don’t learn to speak. That’s why speech delays are the first marker.”
Occupational therapy made the difference for Toby. “Any therapy before the age of 3 is critical,” Jennifer advises. “The brain is able to be re-wired at that point. So don’t wait. Don’t second guess yourself.”
Play-based, with no medications involved, Jennifer watched as Toby’s therapists positioned his body in weird ways, forcing his brain to make new connections. “We did everything they did at therapy at home as well,” Jennifer notes. “We didn’t want the girls to feel ignored because we had a child [with special needs], so we really tried to involve them in his therapy.”
Toby’s progress was rapid. The folks working with Toby called him “The Miracle Boy.” Today Toby is healed completely. Jennifer remains clearly grateful to all those who helped Toby. “It was like they led him out of prison, the prison of his own body,” she says. “They let him be who God made him to be.”
Is your family going through a difficult time? Maybe it's a diagnosis of special needs or a death in the family or _________ (fill in the blank). Find encouragement in Jennifer Shaw's amazing testimony in the April 2011 issue.
Jessie Weaver-
March 24, 2011-
Nature Rocks is a national initiative created by REI, The Nature Conservancy, US Fish and Wildlife Service, American Heart Association, Children & Nature Network, and ecoAmerica, to inspire and empower parents to get their kids and families out into nature, as spending time in nature can help make you happier, healthier, and smarter.
They've just come out with their Spring Activity Guide [PDF], full of 30-minute and 1-hour activities to do outdoors with your kids, as well as helpful tips and tools.
Here's a sample activity from the guide:
Frisbee Frenzy
Stay active while you’re waiting for your picnic dinner to come off the grill. Grab 2 paper plates from the table and make your own Frisbee! In addition to the plates, you will need crayons/markers, staples, and scissors. Poke a hole in the center of 2 paper plates so you can cut out the middles of the plates. Line up the plates (eating side to eating side) and staple sides together. Decorate your Frisbee and you are ready to go out and play!
Tips
- If you have a larger group playing where attention can wander, ask everyone to call out the name of the person they are throwing to so the recipient is ready to catch it!
- Once familiar with throwing the Frisbee, add challenge by throwing it longer, shorter, or to the sides for people to run and catch.
The guide will help you plan fun outside, whether it be a 1/2 hour, an hour, or a whole day! There are even tips for a kid-friendly backpacking trip.
Do you try to get out more during the Fall and Spring seasons? Where do you go?
Jodi Skulley-March 23, 2011-
I don’t know what the weather is like in your neck of the woods, but in Middle Tennessee the past two weeks have been beautiful, complete with sunshine and temps in the 60s to 70s. And for my family, spring couldn’t get here soon enough! Jack is now 2.5-years-old and he is an outside boy. He would spend every second outside if we let him. Being cooped up so much of the winter is difficult for him … and for us!
A few weeks ago, I was the closest I’ve ever been to claiming Jack was in his terrible 2s. We were dealing with difficult behavior and meltdowns more than usual. My patience was wearing thin … and I was worried that it wasn’t going to get any better. I was starting to panic that maybe I wasn’t doing a good enough job as a mother, maybe we weren’t using the right form of discipline, or maybe he was going to turn out to be defiant child!
Enter springtime. We have spent almost every free minute outside in this beautiful weather. It’s amazing to me how outdoor activities, sunshine, and fresh air make a huge difference in Jack’s mood and behavior. He sleeps, better, eats better, and listens better when he has spent time outside. For now, order has been restored in the Skulley household.
The longer I am a parent, the more I am discovering that challenges seem to come in phases. Just when you are ready to give up, things smooth out again. Don’t get me wrong. It’s never “easy.” But with time (and lots of prayer) the challenges become more manageable, and eventually a specific challenge becomes a thing of the past.
I’m reminded of this as I talk to friends who have recently had babies. I faced many of the challenges they faced with their newborns and infants, but looking back now, it feels as if it was a lifetime ago. It is easy to forget how many challenges you have overcome.
Old challenges are replaced with new challenges but that’s what makes parenting an adventure. There is never a dull moment … and I wouldn’t have it any other way!
Our next big challenge? Potty training! Aren’t you jealous?
What is your current parenting challenge? What challenges have you already been through?
Jodi Skulley-March 22, 2011-
"The Story of Jesus” is presented in a colorful way in April's ParentLife. Use this teaching tool to encourage your family through Bible study in the days leading up to Easter. Get everyone involved!
There are 24 stories of Jesus’ life in this teaching tool. As a family, read one passage each night from April 1 to Easter Sunday on April 24.
Divide each color block into different ways to share the story. Read the blue passages aloud; act out the yellow passages; draw pictures to describe the story for the red passages; create a puppet show for the green passages.
Talk about or make a list of everything you know about Jesus. Read the Bible stories together and see what new things you learn about Jesus! Make a list of all the new things you learned in Scripture about Jesus; pray together to thank God for continually learning through His Word.
Worship together by singing songs to go with the different passages about Jesus’ life. Song ideas might include: "Silent Night," "Jesus Loves Me," "God Is So Good," "Zacchaeus," "Fishers of Men," and "Christ the Lord is Risen Today." (For toddler and younger elementary-aged children, Wee Sing Bible Songs is a great CD with a singing book to follow along.)
Make a timeline of Jesus’ life. Cut apart each of the colored passages and place them in order on your timeline.
Read the Bible passage and let younger kids color a picture on that color of paper. During the month, hang the pictures in a hallway to tell the story of Jesus’ life.
Cut up the colored Bible passages and mix them up. Challenge older kids to place the passages in the correct order of Jesus’ life.
Give each person in your family a color to coincide with the Bible passages. Then each family member is responsible for planning the Bible study for that color passage. Challenge older children to create a song, activity, or game to go with the Bible passage. Help younger children retell the Bible story in a few simple sentences and create motions to a song.
Strengthen older children's skills by hosting a Bible drill challenge. Each night, the first one to find the book, chapter, and verse of each passage gets to read it!
Do you do anything with your family to mark the weeks before Easter?
Thank you, Christi McGuire, for these helps. Christi is a freelance writer in Lakewood Ranch, Florida. She and her husband, Matt, enjoy each new day with their two daughters Mary-Allison (5) and Mia (3).
Jodi Skulley-March 21, 2011-
The American Academy of Pediatrics has issued a new statement advising parents to keep their children in rear-facing car seats until age 2, or until they exceed the height or weight limit for their seat's rear-facing capacity.
Right now, the law in most states is that children MUST be rear-facing until age 1 and/or 20 pounds.
CNN reports, "A 2007 study in the journal Injury Prevention found that children under age 2 are 75 percent less likely to die or to be severely injured in a crash if they are rear-facing. Another study found riding rear-facing to be five times safer than forward-facing."
While this may come as a shock to some parents, the AAP has been encouraging parents to keep car seats rear-facing since 2002.
This video from Seattle Children's Hospital explains some of the reasoning and also shows how to install a car seat.
Infant Car Seat Safety from Seattle Children's on Vimeo.
How do you feel about this new push from the AAP? Will it change when you go front-facing or will you switch your child back to rear-facing?
Jodi Skulley--
Each month ParentLife pulls together a one-page document for preschool and children's leaders and teachers that highlights articles that might help families they work with. But this also is a great tool for parents!The articles below are in our current March 2011 issue of ParentLife. Read the articles that minister to your family and pass along a copy to those who might benefit from it!
Check out the new ParentLife! Each cover will capture playful moments in life that parents and teachers love!
Provide parents with this effective monthly tool for family worship times. Equip them with a week's worth of family devotions (that coordinate with what children are learning at church) as well as a calendar packed with application activities to enhance learning throughout the month (pp. 25-27).
Inspire families in your church to watch for and take advantage of teachable moments that arise in everyday life, no matter thier family situations. Remind them that children learn amazing truths by watching the adults in their lives live out their faith in practical ways (pp. 38-39).
Looking to train parents and teachers with the latest and best information about their children? Growth Spurts provides this information about all aspects of a child's development in this new easy-to-read format.
Hear. Know. Do. Teach these three basic principles to parents and teachers in your children's ministry in order to build healthy, strong spiritual foundations in the children of your church. Establish hear, know, and do as the first steps in a lifetime of spiritual development! (p. 28).
Pass along Mom- and Dad-centered articles each month by Angie Smith and Carey Casey to encourage moms and dads in their parenting journeys.
Download a PDF of ParentLife Everyday to pass along to your children's minister or parents in your church:
ParentlifeEveryday_March_2011 copy.pdf
Jodi Skulley-March 17, 2011-
Don't forget to enter the March giveaway! You can enter by scrolling down on that post and answering the question or answering this question on fathering that we posted last week. We're giving away some wonderful books, so you should definitely comment for a chance to win!
Jodi Skulley-March 16, 2011-
Each year in the U.S., more than 2,000 children under the age of 14 die as a result of a home injury, according to Safe Kids USA, a non-profit organization.
“Parents often underestimate their kids’ abilities and overestimate their intelligence,” says Chrissy Cianflone, Director of Program Operations at Safe Kids USA. “They think, my child’s too smart to do X and they often don’t realize how strong their kids are.”
There are so many things to think about as you safe-proof your home to protect small children that it’s easy to overlook important risks.
Most people are aware of common safety measures like covering your electrical outlets, keeping your child away from hot stoves, and watching them like a hawk as they bathe, but there are other dangers that don’t readily come to mind.
Cords from window treatments – According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, one child a month between the ages of 7 months and 10 years dies from strangulation or is severely injured by near strangulation from the loose strings or cords on window blinds and shades. A window covering advertised as cord-less does not mean that it is truly cord-free.Kenney Manufacturing’s new Truly CordFreeTM Roman Shades use a twist wand to raise and lower the shade and inner mechanisms to eliminate all strings and cords.
Dressers and other tall furniture – Dressers are dangerous because they are heavy, not always well balanced and can be pulled over if a child tries to climb them. An unsteady toddler trying to climb doesn’t understand that a heavy object can topple. Invest in brackets found at home improvement stores or baby stores like Babies R Us to anchor dressers, TVs, and wall units. Keep heavier items on lower shelves or in lower drawers, and don’t keep remote controls or temptations like candy or toys on top of furniture.
Window screens – Never rely on a window screen to keep children safe from an open window. Screens are for keeping insects out, not for keeping kids in. Invest in heavier child-proof window screens, which cost under $30. Don’t place furniture by a window, potentially creating a climbing opportunity and the associated risk.
Open medication containers – Be vigilant about your child’s safety away from home. A risky situation can exist when a child visits a grandparents’ home where pills may be left within their reach. Vitamins and OTC medications can be extremely dangerous to children. Remind family members and caretakers to buy pill bottles with child safety caps and keep all medicines and pills out of your child’s reach, preferably locked up.
Under the kitchen sink – More than 100 children ages 14 and under die each year from unintentional poisoning, according to Safe Kids USA. In addition to household cleaning supplies, pesticides, cosmetics, art supplies, paint products and alcohol are dangerous to children. To avoid accidental poisoning, store these products up high in locked cabinets. It is a good idea to install a safety latch to keep the doors to under the kitchen sink secured at all times.
Consider addressing these issues in your home as soon as you can to provide optimum safety for your children.
Thank you, Melissa Kay and Market Builders for this pertinent information.
Have you made any safety changes in your home lately?
Jodi Skulley-March 15, 2011-
I've certainly heard it and thought it a million times: "Time changes were created by someone who doesn't have children."
Trying to get children adjusted to a suddenly adjusted schedule can be daunting at best and torturous at worst. No one wants to go to bed when it's light outside. Hopes of a later bedtime meaning a later wake-up are often crushed by disoriented toddlers.
Here are some tips on getting your children adjusted to the time change:
- Don't skip naps in hopes of having your child go to sleep earlier. Overtired children often resist sleep.
- If your child is old enough to understand, explain the time change and why it began. Not only will this help them understand why it is light outside at 8 p.m., it makes a great history lesson at home!
- Don't be too stringent about bedtime the first week after the time change. Let kids go to sleep 30-45 minutes later than normal and edge back toward their regular bedtime. Keep their routine the same, though, because those steps can communicate "bedtime" more than outside conditions.
- My friend Kat suggests having your child use a sleeping mask as young as age 4. This helps block out sunlight and allows them to get to sleep despite light coming in the windows. She said it really did the trick for her daughter!
Also interesting is that exercise helps your body produce seratonin, which aids in resetting your internal clock. So if you are having difficulty adjusting yourself, a good workout might be the remedy!
Do you have any tried-and-true tips for maintaining sanity during the time change?
Sources: Fox Birmingham, "Make Little Changes to Help Kids with Daylight Savings"
The Examiner, "Adjusting to Daylight Savings Time"
Photo used with permission of Flickr Creative Commons. Click on photo for source.
Jodi Skulley-March 14, 2011-
After a bus fire destroyed all of the band Addison Road’s merchandise, band members Ryan and Jenny Simmons' clothes and personal belongings, musical equipment, and the quartet’s RV tour transportation early last year, fans responded with overwhelming support — helping the band to replace everything lost.
Jenny relates, “I felt overwhelmed. We got a firsthand glimpse of what it’s like to be radically loved by God. There was nothing we could do to earn it, deserve it, or stop it. It was one of the most real pictures of God’s grace I’ve ever seen.”
Read Jenny’s thoughts on family, faith, and life on her popular personal blog: www.jennysimmons.com.
___________
Interested in listening to the music of Addison Road, whom we featured in the March 2011 ParentLife? Here are are their albums.
Addison Road (March 2008)
Stories (June 2010)
Jodi Skulley-March 25, 2011-
6-week-old Zion's T-shirt says it all!
Thanks to Erin S. for this great photo!
Photos wanted! Send us your funny, cute, or just plain fun pictures for our Fun Friday Photos. Each Friday we will post a new "Fun Friday Photo." E-mail your photo and a suggested caption describing the photo to parentlife@lifeway.com. Visit the blog each Friday to see if your photo was chosen!
Jodi Skulley-March 18, 2011-
Eight-month-old Wesley thinks celery makes a great teether! Yummy!
Photos wanted! Send us your funny, cute, or just plain fun pictures for our Fun Friday Photos. Each Friday we will post a new "Fun Friday Photo." E-mail your photo and a suggested caption describing the photo to parentlife@lifeway.com. Visit the blog each Friday to see if your photo was chosen!
Jodi Skulley-March 11, 2011-
Jodi Skulley--
Here's your chance to contribute to a future ParentLife article. Just help us answer the question:
"From throwing a fastball to changing the oil, what are the things you think every father should teach his child?"
Anyone who comments here with a response will get an extra entry to the March giveaway (even if you've already commented on that post)!
[Side note: if you're looking for another chance to win a ParentLife subscription, visit The Inclusive Church!]
Jodi Skulley-March 10, 2011-
I'm sure many of you know who Angie Smith is. Her blog, Bring the Rain, has thousands and subscribers and hundreds of comments on each post. She is the author of I Will Carry You and the forthcoming What Women Fear. Her husband and sister-in-law are both recording artists.
I've known Angie for several years. Her sister-in-law Shawn and I went to church together in Nashville, and Angie and I both attended a Bible study at Shawn's house. I have to share a story with you that is a little chracteristic of my ditziness.
One night Shawn was going to be out-of-town so we had the Bible study at Angie's house. The twins were still toddlers and Kate was maybe 1. As I entered their beautiful home, scents of cooking wafted through the house. Angie explained her husband had helped the girls make pumpkin muffins and caramel apples. She mentioned a few other things he had done that day with the girls.
My mind let this stew and after a few minutes I asked Angie, "Um, what does your husband do? Does he work? It sounds like he is home a lot!"
Oh yes, I did.
Angie was gracious. "Oh, he is in a Christian singing group."
Me: "Which one?"
Angie: "Oh, you may not have even heard of them. It's called Selah."
My jaw dropped. I did not feel like the sharpest crayon in the box, friends.
We weren't far removed from that study when Angie conceived Audrey. About the same time she found out Audrey may not live, the spark of life that became Libbie started to grow in my body. It made me ache for her even more.
We live in different cities now, so I'm happy we've gotten to reconnect through ParentLife. Here are her answers to some questions we pulled together for her. Let's meet Angie Smith!
1. Tell us about your family ... your husband and your daughters. My husband is Todd Smith, who you might know from the Christian group Selah. We have been married 9 1/2 years and have 5 daughters: Abby and Ellie (identical twins) who are 8, Kate is 5, and Charlotte is 9 months. Our daughter Audrey would have been almost 3. She passed away the day she was born, in April of 2008.
2. Why did you decide to start a blog? I actually didn't really know what a blog was when I started writing! We had received a diagnosis about halfway through my pregnancy with Audrey explaining that she could not survive outside of the womb due to several conditions which deemed her "incompatible with life." I was overwhelmed by having to share the story over and over, exhausted by the sadness that came along with having to keep everyone updated as I was just trying to get through it myself.
I decided it would be great to have a place where I could update everyone in a way that was comfortable — just me and my computer, sitting on my bed, and sharing what was going on. I had no (emphasis ... NO) idea that it would lead to the ministry God has given me.
3. How many people follow your blog? Were you surprised by its popularity? Do you have any fun facts related to the blog you can share with us? I honestly don't know how many people actually follow it but I think it's somewhere around 10,000. And yes, I was very surprised that it became so well-read. I still am! But I think it's really because people loved my daughter and felt connected to me through that; also, I think people just relate to the way I love the Lord so fully yet imperfectly.
It is nothing short of an honor to be able to share my heart the way I do. Fun facts ... hmm ... I think it always overwhelms me that so many people read it from other countries. I got an e-mail telling me that a woman had put a prayer request for me in the weeping wall. That was phenomenal. I just love that there is such a sense of community, regardless of geography, race, life situation, etc. It is amazing that no matter where people come from (even spiritually), they have found a home on my blog because they cared for a sweet baby girl who we only got to keep for 2 1/2 hours. It's just amazing the way the Lord weaves His story, isn't it?
4. What is your favorite part about being a mom? Are there unique challenges you face since you have all girls? I think my favorite part is the sense that the Lord chose me to guide them. It is not an easy task by any stretch of the imagination, but when we have those moments where we overhear them sticking up for what's right or praying when they think nobody is listening, it is incredible to feel like I had a part in it. The other night I went in to check on them while they were sleeping and I couldn't believe how long they looked on their beds. I have the privelege of watching them grow into the women of God they are called to be. I think as far as "unique challenges" I will better be able to answer in a few years when they hit the teenage years. I am already praying myself into a head of gray hair. Maybe you should pray for Todd more that me! Ha!
5. What is your involvement with dotMOM? What is dotMOM? I am speaking at the dotMOM conference and am deleriously excited about it. SUCH an amazing group of women and all in different stages of parenting. It is a much-needed conference which will uniquely cater to moms through biblical truth about motherhood, but also just plain old FUN.
I know a little bit from the behind-the-scenes stuff about what they are planning, and it is going to be a blast. I think women are going to be really blessed, not just by the teaching but also throught the fellowship of other moms. It is so important that we have a multi-generational approach to mothering, where we can learn from those who are much farther down the road from us. That sense of "mother mentoring" is a gap that I feel really needs to be filled, and I'm so excited to see the way dotMOM does this. Trust me. You're going to want to plan on it!!!
Thanks, Angie, for helping us get to know you a little better. Check out Angie's first "Mom's Life" column in the March issue of ParentLife.
Jodi Skulley-March 9, 2011-
Every month we have a long list of products we want to share with you, but only a few can fit in the printed magazine. That's why it's so great we have this online space! Here are a few things we couldn't squeeze into the March 2011 issue.
Backyard Safari Outfitters Land & Water Megaview Periscope from Summit Toys ($24.99)
Kids will love to be outdoors with this full-view periscope. They can hide behind trees or rocks to spy on siblings or even plunge the scope underwater for up to 16 inches to observe creatures of the not-so-deep. Recommended for ages 5 and up.
Disaster Game: Family Preparedness Edition ($59.95)
Here is a game you play not with your kids, but for them. It is actually a tool to help adults consider “that’ll-never-happen-to-me” scenarios and make plans for what they would do if a natural, financial, or criminal disaster strikes. The game includes a 16-page booklet of practical information to help your family be prepared for most anything.
Roger Day: Why Does Gray Matter? ($15)
Kids love to learn about the human brain; this collection of 14 songs is guaranteed to help them use their noodles. Perfect for ages 5 to 11 and their parents. Favorite track? Gotta be “Sara Bellum, the Brainy Girl.” This CD makes a great end-of-the-year gift for school teachers too.
Kinderville Little Bites Ice Pop Molds ($16.99 for set of 4)
Don’t let the long title fool you — these silicone sleeves are simple to use to make homemade pushup pops out of fresh ingredients from your own kitchen. They are BPA-free, as well as dishwasher, freezer, and microwave safe.
Is there a product you love and tell everyone you know about? I think mine would be BumGenius diapers and this Fisher-Price Soothing Seahorse. - Jessie
Jodi Skulley-March 8, 2011-
We are proud to have Dr. Linda Mintle in ParentLife each month answering questions submitted from readers. To submit a question for Dr. Mintle, e-mail it to parentlife@lifeway.com and include "? for Dr. Mintle" on the subject line. This month we have an extra Q&A from Dr. Mintle we wanted to share.
Q: My 2-year-old doesn’t eat much. He just is not interested in food. It is hard to keep his attention at the table, and I feel like I am getting in power struggles with him. Should I stop pushing him to eat more?
A: It helps to know what is normal for a 2-year-old when it comes to eating. Growth slows down a bit, and so your child does not need a large amount of calories. Few children at this age get all their food requirements at each meal. They are busy and social. Understandably, they are more interested in play and have limited attention for sitting still at the table.
According to MyPyramid.gov, a helpful Web site developed by the United States Department of Agriculture, an average male child, age 2, needs about 1,000 calories a day. This includes: three ounces of grains, one cup of vegetables, one cup of fruit, three cups of milk, and two ounces of meat and beans. You can go to the My Pyramid Web site, enter your child’s age, gender, height, and activity level and get a more personalized plan. There are many tips on the site to help with food ideas, snacks, and meal planning.
My advice is to not make the table a battleground. At this age, a child can spot an uptight grown-up in a minute and make mealtimes unpleasant. So go with the flow. Let him eat and leave. He can learn to sit longer as he gets older.
Resources:
Thanks, Dr. Linda, for the advice. I could have substituted "daughter" in that question and sent it in myself. I'm still not sure if she's eaten a vegetable knowingly since she was 9 months old, despite the fact that we set them in front of her time and time again. It does get better, right? Have you dealt with a finicky eater in your household? - Jessie
Jodi Skulley-March 7, 2011-
In our March 2011 Growth Spurts section for "On the Way," you might have read about Healthy Baby Bags. These cheery green bags can be distributed to new parents at the hospital and help encourage successful breastfeeding.
The bags include nursing pads, milk storage bags, and information about the benefits of breastfeeding.
If you'd like to send your hospital a letter and further information about the Healthy Baby Bags, you can visit this blog post at By Moms for Moms, the Lansinoh blog.
Would you have liked to receive one of these bags upon leaving the hospital with your newborn?
Jodi Skulley-March 4, 2011-
Does this pose look familiar? If you've seen the March 2011 issue of ParentLife, it should!!
Jodi Skulley-March 3, 2011-
In honor of our redesign, several bloggers are giving away a year's subscription to ParentLife magazine. If you want to win it, here's your chance! Check out one — or all — of the following sites.
@Vonda Skelton.com I've had the joy of writing for ParentLife Magazine for several years and have found it to be a valuable resource for those who care about children emotionally, physically, and spiritually.
@Kids Ministry 101 {photo caption contest}
"Parenting Tip #56: A 12-year-old can send 3344 text messages in one weekend. Get the unlimited plan. And get ParentLife."
@JonathanCliff.com
It's also all-encompassing. There was an article for grandparents, single parents, divorced parents and their step-children, and even that rare breed of married couples living with their own children. This would make a great hand-out resource to the families in my church.
@SamLuce.com {his giveaway is over, but you can read this review if you like!}
One last thing I thought was really neat as a resource for busy families is a monthly calendar that tells you what to do on a certain day to communicate biblical truth in a simple, engaging way.
@Ministry-to-Children.com
And don't forget to enter the March giveaway on this guest post by Nancy Rue — scroll to the bottom for the giveaway details.
Jodi Skulley-March 2, 2011-
The two winners of our February Giveaway are BJ Scholes and Wendy Snipes. Congratulations! You've each won a copy of Angie Smith's book I WIll Carry You.
We will be in contact with the winners by email soon!
Jodi Skulley--
If your tween daughter is like 4.5 million other young women in the world, she may have a thing for Justin Bieber. For those parents who have been either on a sequestered jury or in a coma for the last year, I’m talking about a 17-year-old Canadian music sensation who has stolen the hearts of older tweens and younger teens with his you-know-you-love-me good looks and ultra-trendy image.
Should you be concerned when your 12-year-old stares at the cover of her My World CD for hours at a time or can’t miss a single Tweet of Justin’s Twittering? Probably not – for several reasons.
The boy wonder’s career has soared, largely because he has a way of making his young listeners feel like the music is theirs. While we adults are watching him grow up, his fans are busy projecting their new feelings of I-suddenly-like-boys-but-I-don’t-know-what-to-do-about-that onto this boy whose only “flaw” seems to be the fact that he’s singing about deep love and probably doesn’t know a thing about it.
As far as I’ve been able to tell, he isn’t promoting sex or drugs, and he has yet to be in the negative media spotlight except for a few Internet scams. On the other hand, he is providing girls with a chance to express their confusing feelings in an arena that is safe. Justin is not going to ask them out, try to kiss them, or pressure them in any way.
Tweens have been doing that as far back as there have been male celebrities. Hearts have fluttered, passionate screams have been uttered, and posters have been plastered on bedroom walls for decades. And I can’t say that any girl has really been the worse for it. Yes, now and then a young girl gets a little obsessed, but that’s usually when something else is going on in her life.
For the most part, a crush on an unobtainable male figure is not only nothing to worry about – it’s actually a healthy part of a girl’s emergence into womanhood. Before you launch into, “But nobody but God should be her idol!” hear me out. We’ll get to that.
In their tween years, girls naturally feel the first stirrings of attraction to boys. But since the guys their age are, as we call them on my tween blog, “absurd little creeps,” at least to them, girls unconsciously look for somebody a little more perfect to adore. At the same time, while they may even find boys their own age – or a little older – less than absurd or creepy, they don’t know what to do with those feelings. If a boy two years older did flirt with your tween, she would probably turn scarlet all the way to her hair follicles and run for the nearest girls’ restroom to find her BFFs. It is far safer to daydream about a kiss on the cheek from Justin Bieber than to risk having that actually happen with little Michael next door. I think all parents would agree with that!
When girls do develop a “thing” for a star, they want to fully embrace it. It may seem immature to you for your tween to paper the walls with posters of this cutie, spend all her allowance downloading his music onto her mp3 player, and write lengthy fan letters declaring her undying love. But she is immature. She is 10, 11, 12, 13 years old, untangling those sudden confusing feelings about males. She is learning what it feels like to be attracted to somebody. Sure it’s unrealistic. Deep inside, she knows that. She isn't going to carry over this fantasy into real life. She is just enjoying being a girl.
Keep the whole thing in perspective. Your tween is not “worshiping” an idol. She has a crush. When you and your spouse fell in love, did you ditch God and pour all of your affections out on each other? You’re there to guide your tween into a healthy relationship with the Lord, and that will be her frame of reference in relationships. If you’re focusing on living a joyous Christian life with your daughter, she’s going to know that Justin isn't taking His place.
If your daughter does have Bieber Fever – or any other symptom of tween love – be involved. Stay up on the news about her celebrity interest, so if he does succumb to the temptations of fame and go off the proverbial deep end, you can walk your daughter through it, talk about what went wrong, and how that person needs to be prayed for. If Justin starts recording songs of an objectionable nature, step in and say, “I’m not happy with this particular single, and here’s why.”
Just like anything else she passes through on her journey to womanhood, this is important to your daughter. Making fun of her, putting down her feelings, guilting her are not your best ways to help her down the path. Keep your sense of humor, and at the very least remember the cassette tapes you wore out listening to Michael W. Smith or U2. I firmly believe that God is laughing right along with you.
Nancy Rue is an award-winning author who’s written over 100 books for adults and tweens, and she travels around the country speaking to tween girls and their moms at FaithGirlz events. Moms’ Ultimate Guide to the Tween Girl World is Rue's first book written specifically for parents. She turned her attention to parents after mothers repeatedly asked her for advice on raising their tween daughters. Her latest book is for dads and releases this month: What Happened to My Little Girl?
This month we have 3 copies of Moms' Ultimate Guide to the Tween Girl World and 3 copies of What Happened to My Little Girl? to give away! To enter, just answer this question: Who was your biggest celebrity crush?
I confess I was a huge Hanson fan myself. Fifth-row seats to their Virginia Beach concert, circa 1998. - Jessie
