ParentLife Online | A Christian community for parents

Fun Friday Photo -- November 20th

2009-11-20T13:00:00Z

Griffin Cook, 19 months, demonstrates that it is football time in Tennessee.

Thanks to Dori C. for this great photo!

Photos wanted! Send us your funny, cute, or just plain fun pictures for our Fun Friday Photos. Each Friday we will post a new "Fun Friday Photo." E-mail your photo and a suggested caption describing the photo to parentlife@lifeway.com. Visit the blog each Friday to see if your photo was chosen!

Volunteer Together!

2009-11-19T19:32:36Z

Two weeks ago I attended a great parenting conference by the Family Matters organization — Tim Kimmel's "Raising Truly Great Kids" conference. In one section of the conference, he addressed families with relationship issues. I was impressed by Dr. Kimmel's advice for these families. He encourages them to do service projects together! He observed how serving others helped transform one's focus. Literally, it causes you to think about others and makes you thankful about the blessings you have. What great advice!

The holidays are a prime time to serve others: at church, in your community, and in your neighborhood. Parents who are not sure where to plug in or want to organize their own service project can rely on VolunteerSpot — a free, easy-to-use online tool that takes the hassle and headache out of coordinating volunteers and encourages everyone to get involved.

VolunteerSpot enables anyone to organize a group to sign up for any activity. Organizers can mobilize volunteers with an easy e-mail invitation. Automated e-mails remind folks of their commitments and schedule. No more mass “reply all” e-mails, late-night phone calls, dreaded clipboard sign-up sheets, or confusion over exactly who will be doing what.

VolunteerSpot also includes helpful tools for organizers looking for a little creative input or just plain inspiration, including free eBooks and an active blog featuring ideas and user suggestions for successful event planning.

For more information, visit www.volunteerspot.com.

What service projects are you planning as a family in the coming weeks? Post your plans to inspire others!

The Art of Good Manners

2009-11-19T13:00:00Z

It is never too early to teach your youngest family member how to be a gracious guest. As holiday gatherings approach, prepare your child with some manners. Encourage her to try the following.

Look people in the eyes and say, “Hello.”
Resist the temptation to complain — about the food, entertainment, or other guests.
Say, “Thank you” when served food or beverages.
Stay where the party is. Do not wander into rooms with closed doors.
Clean up after yourself. Do not expect someone else to do it.
Agreeably leave when Mom or Dad says it is time to go.
Thank the host and hostess for inviting you.

For more about manners be sure and check out "The Art of Saying Thanks" by Kay Harms in the November 2009 issue of ParentLife. Also check out these books on manners!

November Giveaway Reminder

2009-11-17T16:07:15Z

Don't forget about our November giveaway ... a $25 gift card to Staples to give you a head start on your holiday shopping.

Staples offers fabulous gifts for the holiday season from Staples exclusives to hot brand-name technology products -- all at great prices. Staples also makes the holiday season easy, as a one-stop store that includes convenient locations, ship-to-store options, and printing services including holiday cards and family calendars. Check out our outstanding deals on Black Friday, Cyber Monday and weekly specials in the Staples circular. Happy Holidays from Staples!

Everyone* who posts a comment on our blog during the month of November will be entered to win!

*LifeWay employees are not eligible for this giveaway. Multiple comments do not increase chances of winning.

Holiday Safety Tips

2009-11-16T15:29:16Z

Thanksgiving is just over a week away and many families are already putting up their Christmas decorations! The holidays are an exciting time of year for kids, and to help ensure they have a safe holiday season, here are some tips from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).

Trees

When purchasing an artificial tree, look for the label "Fire Resistant."
When purchasing a live tree, check for freshness. A fresh tree is green, needles are hard to pull from branches, and when bent between your fingers, needles do not break. The trunk butt of a fresh tree is sticky with resin, and when tapped on the ground, the tree should not lose many needles.
When setting up a tree at home, place it away from fireplaces, radiators, or portable heaters. Place the tree out of the way of traffic and do not block doorways.
Cut a few inches off the trunk of your tree to expose the fresh wood. This allows for better water absorption and will help to keep your tree from drying out and becoming a fire hazard.
Be sure to keep the stand filled with water, because heated rooms can dry live trees out rapidly.

Lights

Check all tree lights — even if you have just purchased them — before hanging them on your tree. Make sure all the bulbs work and that there are no frayed wires, broken sockets, or loose connections.
Never use electric lights on a metallic tree. The tree can become charged with electricity from faulty lights, and a person touching a branch could be electrocuted.
Before using lights outdoors, check labels to be sure they have been certified for outdoor use. To hold lights in place, string them through hooks or insulated staples, not nails or tacks. Never pull or tug lights to remove them.
Plug all outdoor electric decorations into circuits with ground fault circuit interrupters to avoid potential shocks.
Turn off all lights when you go to bed or leave the house. The lights could short out and start a fire.

Decorations

Use only non-combustible or flame-resistant materials to trim a tree. Choose tinsel or artificial icicles of plastic or nonleaded metals.
Never use lighted candles on a tree or near other evergreens. Always use non-flammable holders, and place candles where they will not be knocked down.
In homes with small children, take special care to avoid decorations that are sharp or breakable. Keep trimmings with small removable parts out of the reach of children to prevent them from swallowing or inhaling small pieces. Avoid trimmings that resemble candy or food that may tempt a young child to eat them.
Wear gloves to avoid eye and skin irritation while decorating with spun glass "angel hair." Follow container directions carefully to avoid lung irritation while decorating with artificial snow sprays.
Remove all wrapping papers, bags, paper, ribbons, and bows from tree and fireplace areas after gifts are opened. These items can pose suffocation and choking hazards to a small child or can cause a fire if near flame.

2009 - American Academy of Pediatrics

Stay tuned to the blog for even more safety tips from the AAP next week!

Fun Friday Photo -- November 13, 2009

2009-11-13T13:00:00Z

Aiden, 1 year, on his first trip to pick out pumpkins at the local orchard

Thanks to Lindsey B. for this great photo!

Thinking About a Pet?

2009-11-12T16:17:46Z

We had a tough last year with our pets. Our youngest pet, Tobey, was killed by a wild animal in a neighbor's yard. Our oldest cat, Samantha, had to be put to sleep because of mouth cancer. Aside from dealing with the loss of these dear pets and talking with our kids about their deaths, we soon found that we really wanted another pet. After 5 months, we finally decided on a cat, Charlie. He is a frisky tabby that we dearly love!

After talking with a rep from the ASCPA about a ParentLife article, we found that many families adopt pets at Christmastime. Our monthly Real Life Solutions writer, Dr. LInda Mintle, has some good advice for families considering getting a pet.

Q: Our 10-year-old daughter is begging us for a pet. I have two younger children and adding a pet to the mix feels overwhelming. However, my daughter desperately wants a pet and I am an animal lover. I am not sure about the added responsibility right now. What should we consider in making this decision?

A: Most children will beg you for a pet some time in their young lives. The main issues to consider are the child’s developmental stage and your expectations for taking care of a pet. Obviously a cat or dog would require care and attention — feeding, grooming, exercise, clean up, and more. Other pets, such as fish and guinea pigs, are less time and care intensive and good choices for younger children. They offer you an opportunity to see how committed to taking care of a pet your child really is and how long interest will be sustained. Go to the library and get a book about pet care. As a family, talk about the needs of a pet, what type of pet you may consider, and what the expectations would be. For example, certain dog breeds are more kid-friendly than others. Goldfish or hermit crab requires very little upkeep and expense. Visit a pet store and talk with a friend who has the kind of pet you are interested in to get a better idea of time and care issues.

Know that your child could lose interest in the pet after several weeks and you may end up with the responsibility. Schedule playdates with a friend who has a pet and see if the interest in the pet sustains over time. Decide what you can handle right now and do not be swayed by the begging.

Finally, consider the cost of owning a pet, family stability in terms of moves and housing, the demand of time and energy, and the possibility of the pet becoming a source of family conflict if people slack off on their responsibilities. The benefits of pet owning should be considered as well. Pets help teach a child structure, empathy, compassion, nurturing, loyalty, trust, and responsibility and provide companionship. Pets are also sources of unconditional love and dependability. Pets can improve mood and blood pressure, increase family exercise, and even reduce stress.

For more information on adopting a pet, visit aspca.org. Visit Dr. Linda Mintle at drlindahelps.com.

Do you have a pet? Tell us what kind of pet you have and why!

Winter Wonder Slam 2009

2009-11-11T19:00:00Z

Looking for a fun event for you and your preteen? Check out the Winter Wonder Slam 2009 Tour headlined by GRAMMY® Award winner TobyMac. The tour also features the talents of Relient K, B.Reith, and Stephanie Smith. For the first time ever the tour will head to the West Coast as well as making its way to New York City; Fairfax, Virginia; Pittsburgh; and numerous other cities across the states.

The tour continues its tradition of giving, as Winter Wonder Slam teams up with the U.S. Marine Corps to help with their Toys for Tots campaign. Toys for Tots aims to provide tangible signs of hope to economically disadvantaged children at Christmas. Music fanatics will be encouraged to bring an unwrapped gift to the event as Marines will be on site to collect toys at every venue.

This will be the fifth year that TobyMac has brought his highly energetic show to the holiday season to crowds across the country. This family reunion show is one that keeps bringing people back for more each year sharing the true meaning of Christmas.

For more details on Winter Wonder Slam 2009, visit www.winterwonderslam.com or www.tobymac.com.

Lansinoh Giveaway

2009-11-11T15:07:50Z

Lansinoh® is celebrating its 25th anniversary by having a great giveaway — a huge basket of goodies for 25 winners! Each basket includes the entire line of Lansinoh products. For all the details and to enter the contest, visit the ByMomsForMoms™ blog.

Remembering Heroes

2009-11-10T19:00:13Z

I always find this stretch of November keeps my mind focused on those who have given so much — a time for remembering those who are heroes and who have contributed to making me who I am today. In this season of Thanksgiving, I want to take time to say "Thank you!"

Many of us don't think twice about celebrating November 1 as All Saint's Day. However, I always think of what this day was meant to celebrate — those people who are important in our spiritual growth — the saints like my parents, grandparents, and Sunday School teachers who showed me Jesus' love, read God's Word to me, and taught me about Jesus. They may never get their own day of recognition, but I will always honor the time, energy, and love they invested to me. Mom and Dad, thank you for all that you have invested in me!

And tomorrow is Veterans Day. I salute those who have served our country and sacrificed so much. My own Dad never saw service during wartime but served dutifully at Fort Bragg, where he met my mother. My grandfather and my wife's grandfather both served during World War 2 and battled in the South Pacific and Germany. For them, I am so thankful they served and got to hear their stories of why they fought — to protect the freedoms of those they love. Granddaddy Crayton, thank you for serving our country! I will continue to teach my children about those who have served and sacrificed so much for our freedom.

Who are some of the special people you would like to thank for their service to our country? Or who poured love and time into your life teaching you God's Word? Take time today to tell them how thankful you are for them!

Teaching Thankfulness

2009-11-09T16:29:46Z

In the November issue of ParentLife, Kay Harms helps parents teach their children the art of saying thanks through thank-you notes. Be sure not to miss her practical tips for helping your child exercise gratitude!

For even more help, check out the following resources related to gratefulness and manners.

Manners Made Easy for the Family by June Hines Moore (B&H, 2008)
A Little Hero in the Making: Good Manners for the Young and Brave at Heart by Emilie Barnes and Michal Sparks (Harvest House, 2007)
Everyday Graces: A Child’s Book of Good Manners by Karen Santorum (ISI Books, 2003)
I’m Thankful™ Journal by Sue Lundquist (www.imthankful.com)

How do you teach your children manners? Do you have any great tips to share with ParentLife readers?

Fun Friday Photo -- November 6, 2009

2009-11-06T13:00:00Z

Reed was a "purple opopus" for Halloween. His Enna and Poppy made the costume for him.

Thanks to Jeff and Abbey L. for this great photo!

Orphan Sunday

2009-11-05T14:40:20Z

In celebration of November as National Adoption Awareness Month, Show Hope and Steven Curtis Chapman, along with Focus on the Family and FamilyLife, are helping to lead the charge this Sunday, November 8th -- also known as Orphan Sunday -- for a live event in Nashville, Tennessee, with one goal: raising awareness of the more than 140 million orphans worldwide. The free event, beginning at 4:00 p.m. CST, will be simulcast through satellite and Moody Radio Network and through a webcast at www.OrphanSunday.org. It will also be streamed online at www.GospelMusicChannel.com in the days following the event.

The Orphan Sunday event (held by Cry of the Orphan) will feature a special acoustic performance from Chapman with other musical guests Geoff Moore and the Children of the World Choir. Guest speakers include:

Focus on the Family President Jim Daly, a former orphan himself
Dr. Sharen Ford, Manager for Permanency Services for the Colorado Department of Human Services in the Division of Child Welfare Services
Jedd Medefind of the Christian Alliance for Orphans
Dennis Rainey, an adoptive father and President of FamilyLife

If you live in the Nashville area, this free event will be held at Christ Community Church (1215 Hillsboro Road, Franklin, just south of Nashville) and will not be ticketed. Seats will be available on a first come, first serve basis. So be sure to get there early! Doors will open 30 minutes before show time.

If you don't live near Nashville, be sure to check out the available simulcast and webcast. For more information, visit www.OrphanSunday.org or Cry of the Orphan's Web site.

If you attend this event or participate via simulcast or webcast, we'd love to hear about your experience and what it meant to you. Tell us all about it.

What If I Blow It?

2009-11-04T17:40:43Z

In the November 2009 issue of ParentLife, Bob Bunn, editor of Living With Teenagers, sets out to help you establish boundaries to help your preteen flourish by talking about healthy discipline. Every parent has messed up in the area of discipline before. So what do you do if you make a discipline mistake? Here is what Bob has to say!

What If I Blow It?

You are going to mess up discipline at some point. You will get angry when you should be operating with a calm spirit or the consequences you deal out will be more extreme than the action deserves. So what happens when you blow it? Here are three ideas drawn from research and personal experience.

Apologize. If you stepped out of line with an adult, you probably would not have much trouble admitting it and asking forgiveness. Adopt that same attitude with your preteen. You are not perfect, and she does not expect you to be. So do the right thing and apologize. In addition to rebuilding the relationship, showing a humble spirit in this way provides a great lesson for your child in her future relationships.
Determine what you will do differently next time. If your original attempt falls flat, think through your missteps and determine a better way to approach the situation. You probably have heard it said that people do not plan to fail, they just fail to plan. When it comes to mistakes in discipline, make sure you plan for a better future.
Do it! It is one thing to create a strategy, but if you never put it into practice, it does not do any good. Be intentional and stick with your plan.

Have you ever had to aplogize to your preteen for a mistake you made? What discipline struggles do you face as the parent of a preteen?

Thanksgiving -- Just Around the Corner

2009-11-03T16:25:41Z

It is hard to believe that it is already November and that Thanksgiving is just around the corner. Thanksgiving is a holiday to do exactly what the name implies — to give thanks! But why do we need a holiday to remind us to give thanks?

We often get so busy that we forget how much we have to be thankful for. I know I am guilty of taking my many blessings for granted (even just in the past few weeks). So it is nice to have this special time during the year to slow down, take some deep breaths, and focus on giving thanks.

I personally have so much to be thankful for. My husband, Jason, has always been a fabulous husband, but over the past 16 months, he also has become an amazing father. Our son, Jack, brings joy to our lives each and every day. We have fantastic extended family on both sides ... and most of them live close enough to be involved in our daily lives. Jack definitely has the best grandparents in the world! We have a beautiful home in a lovely town and a circle of fun, supportive friends. Jason and I both have jobs we love for companies that make a difference in people’s lives. We have truly been blessed well beyond what we deserve!

So this year, I want to make even more of an effort to thank God for these blessings. Not only that, but I want to make sure that the people in my life know how thankful I am for them. And I want to be sure to carry that spirit of thankfulness into 2010 and give thanks every day ... not just on Thanksgiving Day.

The November 2009 issue of ParentLife is packed full of great ways your family can celebrate Thanksgiving together. Be sure not to miss it!

What are some of your favorite Thanksgiving traditions?