ARCHIVES
March 2010
03.31.10
When You Think Your Church Leadership Has Made a Bad Call
Each year I receive calls from churches that are in total disarray. In many instances the church membership perceives the church leadership made a bad call. The outcome of that call… relational chaos. When this happens we need to…
- Remember, whether or not the call was right or wrong the decision is made. It is now the responsibility of everyone in the church to work toward unity. Make it your goal to be a peacemaker and unifier.
- Don’t start or join in conversations that lead to the dismantling of someone’s character. In a decision making situation, we can only know the decision-maker’s character if we are 100% sure of their motive. Only God knows the heart and motive is housed in the heart. By the way , 99% of the time the motive behind the decision was to make your church a better place for you and your family.
- Never allow debates concerning the decision to take place in Sunday School classes or small group meetings. This can only lead to further disruption and will for sure wreak havoc on the hearts of unbelievers and young believers.
- Rise above the mayhem and be a unifier. When others around you are attacking the church leadership suggest to the group that if they have a problem with the church leadership they should talk with them personally rather than discussing the issue amongst themselves. Do this graciously, speaking gently and without judging those you are speaking to. A healthier option might be to set up a meeting with the group of people involved in the conversation with the church leadership. This will allow the individuals to get up close and personal with the decision-makers and in many instances, will set hearts and minds at ease.
- Don’t take sides. One of Satan’s most effective strategies is to drive us into battle mode. In every battle there’s an enemy and in every battle one army must win and the other must lose. We begin to believe that we will either be winners or losers so we fight all the more waiting for an outcome that will lead us to believe our team won. Everyone loses when we forget that we are one people battling one enemy, Satan. Ephesians 6:12
- Don’t leave the church, be the church. Stay and be a beacon of healing and help to the church members who are struggling and to the church leadership who made the call.
- Realize that the leaders in any church must make the hard calls. You may not see the rationale behind the decision, you may not see the wisdom in the decision, and you may not see the reason for making the decision. But the church leaders have a view you don’t have. Please read the next point.
- Keep in mind that those in leadership have information at their disposal you don’t have and that they most likely based their decision on a vast array of information you do not know.
- Pray for your leaders. I assure you, no one is hurting more than those who had to make a difficult decision.
I’ve been in ministry for 35 years now. I’ve been the recipient of bad calls and I’ve been the one making the hard calls (and sometimes my hard calls were bad calls). I’ve been hurt by bad calls and blessed by good ones. I’ve perceived that a bad call was made only to realize years later that the devastating call was actually a good one. And I’ve concluded that, even if it is my opinion that a bad call has been made, the best call I can make is to be a biblically functioning follower of Christ. I’m praying the list above may help all of us to do just that.
03.29.10
What I Learned on My Caribbean Vacation
My blog was silent last week but I wasn’t. My wife of 32 years, Julie and myself, vacationed in Jamaica. For those of us seeking understanding and wisdom, if we keep our eyes and ears open, there’s much to learn anytime, anywhere. Below you’ll find a quick list of my learnings from last week.
- Rest is important for clear thinking and for biblical wisdom to override my own opinion.
- Marriage really does get sweeter as you grow older. You must stay in the game long enough to experience the best of times.
- Some fifty year old women still look great in a two-piece swimsuit. My wife is one of them!
- Not everyone should wear a Speedo (my personal opinion is no-one should).
- Everyone should wear a swimsuit.
- Reading for pleasure is as important as reading to gain knowledge.
- When you run out of books to read on the beach, you may have to go swimming.
- God is more vivid when meditating on Him while watching the waves roll onto the beach.
- You pray more intently when a cabbie is driving on the left side of the road… at night.
- People think you’re weird when you bow your head and pray before a meal when you’re on vacation…. but they respect you for it.
- Community can happen anywhere people have a common cause or objective. I found this out while watching March Madness in a sports bar at the all-inclusive resort we were staying at.
- Men make fun of men when you watch March Madness and drink a Diet Coke instead of consuming a margarita.
- It’s never too late to feel, live, and do life younger than you really are.
03.19.10
Coming Home... Seven Actions That Will Drive Me to My Small Group
I’m back in what I call my home state, Kentucky. In fact, I’m seated in one of my favorite restaurants, Gold Star Chili. I love coming to, even passing through Kentucky. While I feel affection for the things of Kentucky, the real reason I love Kentucky is because, every time I find myself in the Blue Grass State I recall long-term friends and the reasons they are my friends, the reasons I love to be with them.
We long to be come back to places where we have real, deep, substantial friends and communities where friendship exists.
There are a few necessities, relational expectations that some people in Kentucky have done for me. If you will do them for your group members their hearts will drive them to your meeting, even more importantly into doing real life with you and the rest of your group.
- Accept Me. Accept me just as I am no matter what mood I’m in, no matter what hurt I’m responding to, no matter what attitude accompanies this era of my life.
- Elevate Me. When I am feeling poorly about myself remind me that I am high on your relationship list by inviting me to do lunch with you, telling me what special gifts and abilities I have, welcoming me into your home at a time other than the meeting time, telling me more about your story, etc…
- Push Me. Don’t allow me to remain as I am. Graciously and wisely move me out of my comfort zone in to experiences and opportunities that will grow me. Then celebrate with me when I have done so.
- Use Me. Find a role for me, equip me, empower me then use me in some meaningful way to make our group successful.
- Listen to Me. When we talk, don’t lecture me, don’t feel an obligation to teach me or pray for me (although there are times when this is necessary). Just listen sometimes. I long to be heard as much as I long to learn from you.
- Anticipate the Me I will Be. See me as the person I will become, not just the person I am. This will endear you to me and me to you.
- Be with Me. Spend time with me at times other than meeting times. This tells me that I am more than another number turned in on the report you turn in to the church leadership. Socialize with me and I’ll know that we are friends, not just co-laborers.
A clean house, a smiling face, a well-prepared discussion, and great food may make for a great meeting. But if you meet the needs of the heart noted above group members will know they’re not just coming to the group meeting, rather they’ll understand that they’re coming home.
03.17.10
Intangibles... Are These the Unseen, Immeasurable, Unmistakable Necessities?
I am a church consultant. The role God has placed me in is that of helping churches realize and embrace their present reality and move them to an even more effective one
But how do we judge “effective?” In too many circles, if the truth were known, church leadership marks effectiveness in the following ways.:
· How many people show up at weekend services?
· What percentage of our congregation is in Sunday School or a small group?
· Are we meeting budget so we can fund our programs?
· Is there a building project in process?
· How many people have we baptized in the last 12 months?
· Did the pastor and staff receive raises this fiscal year?
In most of the churches consultants are asked to grow these numbers or help churches get to the point that they can do these things.
I’ve been pondering lately… Are these the expectations that prove a church’s (or a staff’s) effectiveness. A quick read of the New Testament might foster a rethink. I’m wondering about each of these and would love your input. I’ve restated these goals and then given some thoughts on each one.
· How many people show up at weekend services?
In the first century there were no weekend services. There were gatherings in the temple courts made up of people wildly electrified by the chaos the Holy Spirit was creating. I’d be nearly certain that no-one was counting noses to see if more were in attendance this week than last week.
· What percentage of our congregation is in Sunday School or a small group?
The entire church was made up of people meeting in homes. Every group was a small group and most church historians tell us that every house church was considered a church. Percentage of the church in a small group… 100%.
· Are we meeting budget so we can fund our programs?
Meet budget, programs? Here’s what the Bible says… There were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned lands or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales and put it at the apostles' feet, and it was distributed to anyone as he had need. Acts 4:34-35
· Is there a building project in process?
There were no buildings until about 312 A.D. Yet the church grew from an estimated 25,000 to 20,000,000 between the time of the resurrection of Jesus and Constantine legalizing Christian worship.
· How many people have we baptized in the last 12 months?
This is a very important question and perhaps the one we should truly consider but in many church circles this one isn’t nearly as important as all of the rest.
Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not questioning the role of the church as she is today. I am revealing thoughts that flood my mind. I’m wondering if the greater markers of church effectiveness, if the New Testament is the guide, would be the following.:
· Are we experiencing the work of the Holy Spirit in power?
· Is the church praying believing and expecting God to do things greater than she could do in her our own power?
· Is the gospel of Jesus Christ being talked about openly by non-pastor types as they go about doing life every day?
· Is the church experiencing unity? That is, are individuals asking for, giving and receiving forgiveness from and for one another when conflict arises?
· Is the church's first utilization of tithes and offerings utilized to meet the needs of one another and people in the community where Christ has placed His church or has the funding of programs trumped this?
· Are groups of believers gathering together in homes for meals, prayer, and for discussions concerning Jesus and His words?
· Does the church cherish, respect, and follow the church leadership understanding that they are chosen by and accountable to God for the oversight of His bride the church?
· Is church leadership living and leading like the apostles… consistently studying, living, and teaching the truths found in God’s Word (not just the theological perspective taught to them in the tradition of their denomination), meeting with and mentoring others, spending meaningful time in passionate prayer, doing ministry without expecting to live extravagant lifestyles, being models of believers trusting God to work miracles, and willing to die for the cause of Christ?
These ponderings sometimes haunt me. How about you?
03.16.10
Healthcare, Controversy, and Small Groups
“Never discuss religion or politics.” Many of us know this phrase. It has been a staple on the Keep the Peace menu for generations. This is really good advice when leading a small group.
Conversations can quickly turn into controversies and controversies have the ability to overtake the reason a group exists, especially in the dramatic political times we’ve been placed in.
A few suggestions:
· Keep in mind (and if necessary remind your group) that debating religion and seeking a biblical view are not always the same. Oftentimes discussing religion has as its goal to instill someone’s dogma, whether or not that dogma is God’s truth. Seeking a biblical view has as its goal to find out what God is saying for the purpose of building up one another.
· Keep in mind that the depth of passion accompanying a political perspective is often as intense or more intense than a person’s passion for Christ. This doesn’t mean that the group member is no longer passionate about Jesus, sometimes it simply means that the individual believes that they are losing ideologies that, in his/her mind, Jesus Himself espoused. They are dogmatic because they see the moral values Jesus inspired and taught are soon to be no more welcoming in an era of moral anarchy. The group member has as her/his, sometimes subconscious, goal to save society. Respect them for their integrity, love them because you are their shepherd, and silence them if necessary to protect community.
· Keep in mind that you may have group members who remain silent during these types of conversations but internally they are losing respect for you (because you allowed the conversation) and for fellow group members. Why? The silent or subtle group member has a differing opinion than those who are zealous and vocal and are unwilling to enter the dangerous arena of debate.
· Don’t allow political conversations to take place during group meetings. Political discussions during a small group meeting seldom end well. But most importantly, a secondary gospel becomes primary. It is the gospel according to the Republican or Democratic Party (sometimes your Independents will get their ideology espoused) and will certainly confuse the unbeliever or young believer in the group. Your goal is to make sure the pure gospel of Jesus Christ is the target and that no obstacles are placed between that target and the hearts of your group members.
· Point out to your group members that God places leaders in the roles that they have. Romans 13:1
· Pray together for your elected officials even when your views or the views of your group members are different than the ones these elected officials are espousing. I Timothy 2:2
· If a small group member’s heart is overtaken by the political scene and needs to process with someone, meet him/her at a time other than the group meeting for a conversation.
I would be thrilled to hear your thoughts on this blog post. What do you think?
03.15.10
Small Group DNA According to Neil Cole
It seems there are as many opinions concerning the DNA of a healthy small group as there are cells in the human body (exaggeration for sure but they are plentiful). Every time I see a new list it makes me ask questions about my own group. Neil Cole is not your average church leader thinker consultant guy, he’s one of the best. Thought you might like to see his description of simple/house church DNA.
- Divine truth (The revelation of God to mankind – based on the truths of God’s Word and the person of Jesus)
- Nurturing relationships (Just as God is relational, so we humans are created with an intrinsic need for relationships.)
- Apostolic mission (We are sent out as God’s representatives with His message to mankind.)
This info is from Neil’s book, Organic Church.
03.12.10
Synergy, Friends who Mean Something, and Saddleback Small Group Conferences
A few weeks ago it was my opportunity to spend a couple of days in a room with Bill Search, Reid Smith, Eddie Mosley, Ben Reed, Tom Bougher, Lyman Coleman, Randall Neighbour, Greg Bowman, Carl George, Steve Gladen. You may know all of these names or they may all be new to you. Bottom line… This is a who’s who in the small group world.
We simply threw out a topic and discussed, debated, deliberated on it for a period of time. Each of us had opinions that we lunged into the conversation. And each of had had past experiences that guided us toward the opinion we had. But the most important part of the conversation wasn’t one person’s thought, the most important part of the conversation were the principles and practices that unveiled themselves due to collective reasoning.
Synergy is one of the most amazing experiences of small group life. Long for it, look for it, make it happen. It’s easy. Simply create an environment where everyone feels comfortable talking then after many have spoken say something like, “What is the bottom line?” or “What do you think we’re learning here?” or “If we could sum this up in a couple of sentences what would those sentences be?”
Know this… synergy flows best with friends who mean something to you. When this band of small group brothers got together many of us knew about each other, some of us knew one another somewhat, and a few were already close friends. In just a matter of hours I felt a substantial connection to each of these guys. Today I’d call them all friend, a term set aside in my world for people who my heart connects with and I trust. Hopefully your small group is made up of “friends.”
A very close friend in this space is Steve Gladen, small group guru at Saddleback Church. I have been honored to present at Steve’s small group conferences the last few years. He has taken the risk of welcoming me into his circle of acceptable thinkers and communicators. This is one of the greatest honors of all. His reputation is on the line with each session I lead. But trust is what makes a group a family. Steve’s welcoming me into his circle of acceptable thinkers and communicators and trusting me with his reputation is very empowering. Be sure you trust something to your small group members that lets them know how much you trust them, even when it puts your reputation on the line.
By the way, Steve’s “Community U” small group conferences are fantastic. If you’re anywhere near any of the following cities, you’ll want to make a way to show up and bring your small group leaders. They’ll leave inspired as well as educated.Get more info at www.bit.ly/Smallgroupconf
April 16-17 Nashville, TN
May 21-22 Milwaukee, WI
July 16-17 Los Angeles, CA
Aug 20-21 St. Louis, MO
Sept 24-25 Seattle, WA
Oct 15-16 Baltimore/Washington, D.C.
Nov 5-6 Miami, FL
03.11.10
Subcultures... The Church Must Escape Her Own
If the church wants to change the culture she must first escape her own subculture.
We live in a culture of subcultures. Each subculture is known for what she believes and doesn’t believe, do and doesn’t do, and the attitudes that those who make up a particular subgroup exhibit. If those of us who are the church are going to influence our unbelieving friends in other subcultures we may want to consider some of the ideas below.:
- Set aside the monologue and join in the dialogue. Too often we church types spout off information (without taking a breath) to people who simply want to engage in conversation with us (maybe our alter-ego wants to be a preacher). Listen more than you talk.
- Have an opinion. The unbelieving community sees us as overzealous regurgitaters restating what church leaders have been telling us. We are seen as non-thinkers in a thought-provoked society. Don’t say, “My pastor says,” or “It doesn’t matter because God’s opinion is the only one that counts.” It's okay to have an opinion of your own and sometimes you'll need to mention that you're looking forward to finding out what God tells you about something.
- Stop protecting the institution and start protecting Jesus’ reputation. Too many believers think that, when involved in a conversation about the faith journey, that the vehement unbeliever they are speaking with is attacking that which they love most, their local church. Well-meaning believers push back hard. Instead of protecting the imperfect institution that has proven throughout history that her imperfections can lead to physical and sexual abuse, manipulation of the masses, even war, show Christ’s love and lifestyle by being a gracious servant and friend to those outside the subculture we call church.
- Stop confusing tolerance with acceptance. We cannot accept acts of sin but we can and must embrace pre-Christians even in their sin, Jesus did. Tolerating someone’s lifestyle is not a precursor to accepting the person involved in sinful acts.
- Remember… not yet followers of Christ are not projects they are equal planet dwellers we are building friendships with. No one wants to be someone’s project, especially if the one who is the project builder’s goal is to take them from a lifestyle they are comfortable with and enjoy. Make friends of unbelievers for friendship’s sake and maybe someday your being Christ in her/his presence will allow them to want to know more about Christ. Ask yourself this question… If this person were never to become a Christ-follower would I still want to hang out with them? This is a good guide to whether or not you’ve got a project or a friend.
- Stop projecting moral superiority. Maybe nothing turns an unbeliever away from the faith more than believers who depict themselves as the keeper of right moral standards and everyone else is morally inferior to them. Remember, you have a guide for life, the Bible. It governs right and wrongness for you. The unbeliever does not. Their perspective on what is right and wrong is as right to them as what right and wrong is to you.
- Be you. When unbelievers see no difference in your lifestyle than their own they believe you lack integrity. Influence always accompanies integrity. If you want to influence the unbeliever you’re friends with be a consistent follower of Jesus, even when it’s a bit uncomfortable or embarrassing. Bow your head and pray silently before a meal, don’t use language that contradicts a Jesus-centered lifestyle, tell the friend you’re with that the movie they’re wanting to see is just not your thing, etc… The important thing is that you never demand or expect that they join you in your rituals and decisions. Enjoy them as they are and they will probably accept you and respect you just as you are.
Obviously, this post is focused on what each one of us can do personally, when with the people we know. Here’s why… I think the church has proven that marketing ourselves differently, doing city-wide projects, having prayer vigils for the city and towns we live in, etc… does help the reputation of the church. But if she’s going to be seen as part of the culture rather than a faith-based subculture for a select group of people it’s going to take each of us being real while being Jesus with those who are entrenched in their own subculture.
03.10.10
Leadership Team Meetings, How Long Should They Be?
This morning I’ve had an ongoing e-mail conversation. One of my favorite leaders and I have been discussing how long leadership meetings should last. This all started with an e-mail he forwarded to me suggesting 22 minute meetings. I responded with the following e-mail.
7:50 a.m.
Interesting. This is a great idea if the leader doesn't plan on creating a team, allowing synergy to get the best from everyone, and the leader just doesn't care about the lives of the people they're leading. I can certainly see this as being an important way to do a meeting if the leader is just trying to make a quick decision, especially those decisions a leader has already made but wants to make those who work for them believe they've been given a chance to give input.
(After a re-read I realized the 7:50 a.m. e-mail sounds negative and attacking. I should proof-read e-mails when writing them in the early morning hours.)
7:55 a.m.
His response… I look at meeting as two kinds, information/planning and strategy meetings. Strategy meetings take lots of time, I usually plan at least two hours. However, on the synergy and building team, there are lots of ways to do that other than in a meeting with computers open and cell phones on. The meeting that would apply to what I sent is about getting to a decision or information out quickly.
Maybe I just sit it too many meetings, most of them bad, but I have rarely been to one, productive, that was more than 30 minutes. My department meetings are once a week for 30 minutes. My team loves me for it and I feel certain we have a very strong team with great synergy.
8:30 a.m.
My response to his response… I sure don't disagree with the principles you’re espousing. That's the reason I spoke of what the goal of the meeting was when I spoke of the difference between a quick decision meeting and a synergistic meeting where people give meaningful input. I'm sure you do both with your team.
Here's the deal... Most people do not feel their ideas are valued, believe they are seen as having more to bring to the table than getting their job done, and perceive that the organization does not believe they can make a major difference unless they are in meetings that allow them to be involved in the thought process. Sometimes administrative types confuse getting the job done quickly with leadership. Efficiency trumps growing team members for those who value completing a checklist. They value going home with the check list done over building people. In most instances this leads to vision-less team members who simply do their jobs and go home.
Sometimes management passes down to those below them on the food chain what role they will play and how work will get done. That's fantastic management, not great leadership, especially if management is trying to see who their leaders, visionaries, dreamers, and culture changers are. This is especially perplexing for an organization like a church. Perhaps no organization I know of has more people with leadership abilities than staff members. They are leaders at some level or they wouldn’t have been hired to lead a ministry area (or the church made a bad hire) Most come to their new church thinking they will be involved in game-changing conversations only to find out they aren't invited into them. These staff members soon settle into the role that the organization silently but boldly stated they would fill. At some point they grow tired and lifeless (this is when we tell them they’re burned out and need to get help or leave.) because they are shut out of the conversations that give them life.
Some will say that feelers need longer meetings, others will proclaim that leaders keep their hirelings from getting their job done if they have meetings that go too long, and there are those who are wise, they find a healthy balance in the 22 minute meeting and the three hour meetings.
03.08.10
What to do When Capable People Say they Can't Lead a Small Group
I’m psyched! I’m at my alma mater today, Campbellsville University in Campbellsville, Kentucky. One of the professors, Dr. Shane Garrison is becoming one of my heroes. He stuck his neck out and is leading a class for education ministers. The class is focused on small groups. Each student’s primary responsibility… lead a group of their own. Dr. Garrison allowed me to join the students for lunch, hear how their groups are going, and field some questions. I don’t’ know that I helped these young ministerial entrepreneurs but they sure inspired me.
Before I took questions each of the students described their group to me. One of the groups is led by a very anglo kinda kid and his group is made up of three African-American athletes. He thinks they joined the group believing they had to because he was their floor monitor. What they didn’t know when they signed up… he’s not their floor monitor. One young man is leading a group of 50 somethings, men who attend his church. He’s the youth minister there. Another young lady is leading a group of women and they’re peering deeply into John Eldredge’s Wild at Heart, a book written for men. They’ve already tackled Captivating. The list of incredible and atypical groups goes on and on. Every one of those students created a flood of anticipation in me. If these young men and women are the future of small group ministry, the world may have an opportunity to hear about Jesus in the context of a safe community.
One of these students forced me to reconsider when a group is capable of becoming a group. She’s deaf and leads a group of senior adults who are also hearing impaired. Obstacles are invisible to this adventuresome 30 something. When the group couldn’t make gathering together work she found a way for these individuals to go online, get on screen together, and use sign language to communicate with one another.
Too many people see obstacles as the end of possibility rather than viewing an impediment as breakable, moveable, and/or capable of getting around. Small Group Pastor, when someone tells you they can’t lead a group and begin giving you reasons why, pursue the following questions with them.
- Is leading a group something you believe God wants and/or made you to do? If the answer is yes then move on to the next question.
- What is it that stands in the way of your leading a group? If there are ways you can help the individual to understand how to remove the obstacles do so. If you can remove the obstacles for them do so.
- What can I do to make things easier for you? Take notes so they know you mean it and be sure you do the things mentioned if at all possible.
- Now that we know it’s possible for you to host a group, why don’t you take a week and pray/think about it? Tell them you’ll call them in a week to see if they are willing to lead a group. Call them on the day you said you would.
Remember, once the person answers the first question you are helping them accomplish something God has for them to do, not forcing them into an expectation of you creation.
A few suggestions:
- Don’t push for a commitment. You may get a yes today and wish you hadn’t two months after the group starts meeting.
- Realize that this person may not take on a group right now but they may spend the next few months removing the obstacles that keep them from leading a group. The individual may take on a group in the future.
- If the individual doesn’t choose to lead a group, thank them for considering group leadership and let them know that you are thrilled that they are involved in group life. Let them know that you’d be thrilled if they’d consider group leadership in the future.
Are there any obstacles that really do keep people from leading a group? For sure… but not if you’re in Dr.Garrison’s class.
03.05.10
Leftovers... When a Small Group Gets Smaller
Last night we had lazy leftovers for supper. I hate leftovers on Thursday nights. They exist only because small group members cancelled at the last minute the night before. You’ve had the calls. These calls never last long and some of the reasons for missing are as follows… “My husband is on the road and I’m not feeling well.”, “Gotta work late tonight.” “It’s been a long week and I just need some time to myself.” “I gotta wash my hair.” (Well, the last one isn’t for real but sometimes it feels like the people you’re trying desperately to connect with are dodging you.).
When this happens a range of emotions and thoughts flood through our minds:
- Disappointment… I’m disappointed because I know what God is willing to do when His family gets together.
- Self-Evaluation… I must be the worst small group leader in the world.
- Anger… Do these people really expect us to clean house, prepare a meal, work on a Bible study and then call at the last minute to say they can’t make it?! Would they bail at the last minute if a friend invited them over for supper and a night of Wiii?!
- Comparisons… How would they feel if they did all this work then we decided not to show?
- Coalitions… Maybe I should just ask the people who are consistent to be our group and ask the others to find a group they would be excited about.
- Questions… Could he have made it back from his business trip in time if he’d tried? If she’d taken a couple of aspirin could she have come tonight? Did she have to work late tonight or did she choose to work late so she wouldn’t have to come to group? Don’t we all need some time to ourselves, why not hide in your cave a night other than this one?
After thinking all of these thoughts we might say to ourselves… “I think I’ll just give them leftovers.” Instead of preparing something wonderful, I’ll just give them second best stuff. Supper… peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (and you’ll create them yourselves), no house cleaning (if you’ve got dog hair all over your black pants when you get off the couch stinks for you), prepare a Bible study, not on your life (we can have a discussion without me even thinking about it and if you walk away believing there’s thousand ways to heaven not my problem). In fact, if you end up separated from God it’s your problem. If you’d shown up for last week’s meeting even someone like you might have had a shot for an eternal relationship with God.
A few things to remember:
- Small group members seldom mislead or lie to you. Believe them when they tell you why they can’t make it to the meeting.
- The enemy wants to get into your head and create division in your group and he’ll definitely use situations like these to do it.
- When your group shrinks the opportunity to affect one another grows. The smaller the group the more personal the conversation.
- God may have concluded He wanted a smaller group to gather tonight for a reason only He knows.
- Jesus said, “…where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." (Matthew 18:20)
