ARCHIVES
April 2010
04.30.10
Disciple-making... What if We're Wrong?
Jesus said, “make disciples.” (Matt. 28:19). And when Jesus says to do something Christiandom will be jazzed to conclude how to do it. In the various circles I’ve run in since swan-diving into the career ministry space I’ve seen at least fifteen different models. Makes a guy wanna’ ask the hard question, who’s right? Or better yet, what if everyone is wrong?
Some questions I’ve been pondering…
· What if disciple-making is not so much about knowledge gained as it is about my story becoming known and His story being integrated into my own?
· What if disciple-making is not so much about my story being known as it is about telling Jesus’ story?
· What if I disciple-making has little to do with “working on my issues?”
· What if disciple-making is not so much about concluding what the final product should look like and then creating a series of studies that create that final product?
· What if disciple-making is less about “accountability” between brothers and more about fearing God enough to obey Him wholeheartedly?
· What if disciple-making is really about the productivity of the Holy Spirit as I do life under His direction and nurture?
· What if a series of studies is vital to the disciple-making process but we set them aside because we are “organic” disciple-makers?
· What if there is no assessment that can tell me what level of maturity I am at but my closest friends and family members can reveal this to me because they can see how honestly I exhibit love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, and self-control. After all, these are the marks of a mature believer. (Galatians 5:22 – 23)
· What if it’s impossible to make disciples if all we do is get together once a week?
· What if we’ve downplayed the expectations of a disciple and are leading people to believe they are disciples without making the necessary commitments. (Check out Luke 14:26 – 35, Matt. 16:24 – 25)
· What if we’re clinging to methods and modes for making disciples that are incorrect simply because those who we admire and respect once told us how disciple-making should be done?
· What if we are using man’s ways to do what only God can do in His way, way is not a process but is mostly relational?
Please know that these questions have very little to do with my opinion. These are simply questions I’ve been asking myself as of late.
Would love to see your thoughts. Please comment.
04.29.10
When Group Members Are Backed in a Corner
Oftentimes group members show up for the gathering backed into a corner. There’s a financial situation, an alcoholism or drug addiction situation, an moral breakdown situation (a bad decision of the group member’s own making), a relational situation, a marriage situation, a teenager in full sprint away from God situation, an ADD or autistic child situation. The list of difficult situations could go on… ad nausea. In our crazy world it is undeniable and naïve to think all is well with everyone when your small group meets. Some of your group members are backed in a corner, blinded by the situation they find themselves in. They need sustainable and realistic hope, a hope that promises God is still on their team and that He is going to guide them even though they can’t determine the next step themselves.
When God speaks to exiled Jews reminding them of their coming deliverance He says, “I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.” Isaiah 42:16
Small Group leader and Small Group Pastor, these words from God Himself can be easily memorized and often used to assure individuals that a perfect world doesn’t exist but that God will lead even when we are blinded by our pain, history, or the enemy’s whispers. That, if we will trust Him He will guide our next steps.
I have found that this passage is appropriate and brings comfort and hope to those dealing with almost any issue. Maybe it will help you as you shepherd others.
P.S. Emphasize that last sentence… “These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.”
04.26.10
Small Groups and Church Planting III, Finding, Training, and Encouraging Leaders
One huge hurdle church planters must get over is small group leadership. Because the relationships found in a small groups is the key to keeping those who are considering the church, the finding, recruiting, training, and the ongoing encouragement of leaders is very important. But small group leaders are hard to come by when planting.
Another issue for church planters is the encouragement, ongoing support, and answers to small group leaders questions. Below you’ll find a list of super small group blogs as well as two websites where answers to most of the practical leadership questions are accessible and free. Give your small group leaders this list so they can turn to these experts to find the answers to their questions. This will save you valuable time.
A few suggestions…
Finding Leaders…
· Pray for God to send small group leaders who have experience leading groups.
· See every sane adult as a potential small group leader. There are two important characteristics that a small group leader should exhibit, 1) “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” 2) “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Mark 12:30-31
· Soon after someone chooses membership, meet them for coffee. Conclude if they are possible leaders. If so, get together again and ask them to consider leading a group.
· Have a booth in the lobby where the church meets. Ask the senior leader to make the church aware that groups are forming and that the church is in need of small group leaders. Be available to answer questions and get commitments from leaders.
Training Leaders…
· Do a one day training event. If you need a step-by-step guide consider Small-Group Kickoff Retreat: Experiential Guide for Small Group Members.
· Lead an eight week turbo group twice a year for new leaders. A great resource for this training is Becoming Small Group Leaders.
· Connect with other church leaders in your area. I’d be thrilled to come and lead the training. If four churches can partner it will only cost them 300.00 (3 hour seminar) or 500.00 (full day Saturday seminar) per church and travel expenses.
Encouraging and Assisting Leaders (great small group blogsites and three websites)…
Blogsites:
Alan Danielson… http://www.alandanielson.tv/
Bill Search… http://www.simplesmallgroups.com/bills_blog/
Heather Zempel… http://discipleshipgroups.blogspot.com/
Eddie Mosley… http://eddiemosley.com/
Reid Smith… http://2ormoreresources.blogspot.com/
Randall Neighbour… http://www.randallneighbour.com/
Mac Lake… http://www.maclakeonline.com/
Tracey Smith… http://smallgrouppastors.wordpress.com/
Mark Howell… http://www.markhowelllive.com/
Dave Treat… http://blog.thinkingsmall.net/
Frank Chiapperino… http://frankchiapperino.com/
Michael Mack… http://smallgroupleadership.blogspot.com/
Saddleback Small Group Life…http://www.saddlebackfamily.com/blogs/smallgroups/index.html
Willow Creek Group Life… http://www.willowcreek.com/grpblog/
Serendipity by LifeWay… http://serendipityblog.com/
Websites:
Small Group Help… http://www.smallgrouphelp.com/
Small Group Trader… http://www.smallgrouptrader.com/Home
SmallGroups.com… http://www.smallgroups.com/
Things I Wish We Had Done:
· Early in the church’s life, I wish I had utilized service/task groups only. In many church plants a few people do a massive amount of work. If I had it to do over again I would make all groups task groups. The band would rehearse as well as do group together. The greeters would greet as well as do group together. This would have saved many of our teams at least one meeting per month and for some one per week.
· Early in the church’s life I wish I had landed on an approach and stuck with it. I tended to ask our small group pastor to consider new ways of doing groups again and again. It’s been proven that a new model needs at least two year s to conclude if it’s going to be effective.
· Ask each group to adopt the subdivision where the group was meeting. Groups are the perfect way to connect with new residents. A few ways to do so: 1)Utilize the curiosity of neighbors to make people aware of the church (when cars are parked in front of a home at the same time each week neighbors are wondering what’s going on), 2) On special holidays ask groups to do something for the neighborhood they are in (Easter egg hunt, movie night on the side of someone’s garage door, etc…). 3) If the neighborhood has a pool the small group could host a pool party.
04.22.10
Small Groups and Church Planting II, Choosing the Right System for Your Church
Small Groups done right are one of the sure pathways to making disciples and growing a church. Sunday School churches are doing them alongside their traditional approach, many churches do small groups exclusively, and I’m thinking 99% of church plants are laser-like focused and will do small groups without ever considering another option. But these organic microcosms of the church have become so diverse that most church leaders are not sure what they’re really discussing when a conversation about them starts up. There are at least seven different systems for doing groups and each of them has more variations on that particular theme than a Paganini Concerto.
Seven of the prevailing systems are…
1) Organic Community Groups
2) Preference of two or more group types
3) Closed Small Groups
4) Open Small Groups
5) Free Market System
6) Making Extraordinary Disciples
7) Cell Groups/Holistic Small Groups.
Choosing the right system for your church is vital. There are five criterion that you may want to consider when determining which system is best for your situation.
1) The senior pastor’s primary passion. Is it Theological, Relational, Restorational, or Missional? If you get this wrong, no matter how well the groups are doing numerically, there will never be a consensus that the ministry is accomplishing what it should.
2) Is the first entry way to the church the small group? If so, choose a system that has many different kinds of groups and many groups with low expectations of group members.
3) The number of leaders required for the group ministry to be effective. If your church doesn’t have enough group leaders for a given system choose an approach that demands fewer leaders.
4) What will you do with children. If you don’t have a large enough congregation to have childcare for groups during meetings the children will need to be equals in the group with adults or choose an approach so that husbands watch the kids while mom attends a group meeting and moms watch kids while dad attends a group meeting. Be sure to meet the needs of your single parents too.
5) Demographics. While this isn’t scientific my experience has shown me that the following groups do best with the demographic noted below. These demographics do represent the flagship church for each system.
Socioeconomics as well as the amount of education in a given demographic seemed to play a significant role in the effectiveness of each group system. The ratings on ZipWho.com at the time of the research utilized the terms below average, average, and above average. In order to find out where the community your church is in ranks, go to ZipWho.com and type in your church’s zip code. When you do this you will get even more specific information including median income, cost of living index, median mortgage to income ratio, average household size, median age, etc… . If your community falls in the top 10% or the bottom 10% of a category the website will designate that fact.
1) Organic Community Groups… Income: Below Average, Education: Above Average
2) Preference of two or more group types… Income: Above Average, Education: Above Average
3) Closed Small Groups… Income: Above Average, Education: Above Average
4) Open Small Groups… Income: Above Average, Education: Above Average
5) Free Market System… Income: Above Average, Education: Above Average
6) Making Extraordinary Disciples… Income: Average, Education: Above Average
7) Cell Groups/Holistic Small Groups… Income: Below Average, Education: Below Average
04.20.10
Small Groups and Church Planting I
I’m on Southwest Airlines flight #497 to Orlando. The purpose of this trip… to lead training sessions at Exponential Conference, an amazing annual church planting conference. I find myself reminiscing about my seven years as a church planter. God whispered in my ear that I should plant The Bridge, a healthy church in Spring Hill, TN. From the very beginning I knew she would be a church of small groups. What I didn’t realize was that starting a groups ministry when you don’t even have enough people for one group is completely different than starting groups in an established church with many people willing to lead groups as well as individuals longing to give groups a try.
Maybe you can learn from my mistakes, miscalculations, and experiences. For the next four days I’m going to make you aware of some of these miscues and let you know what I believe I should have done differently.
Today I’d just like to list some awarenesses I should have taken into consideration:
1. I had the opportunity to establish the group DNA that would permeate our groups for decades to come.
2. In order to establish effective DNA the training and nurturing of leaders to lead groups into the right DNA is vital.
3. Recruitment of small group leaders must be ongoing and apprenticing is a necessity.
4. I must trust people to lead groups who do not match the criterion for group leadership I espouse.
5. Some of those who become part of the church plant will want to start groups whose DNA differs from and that might sidetrack that of the church leadership.
6. When a church is being planted everyone is very busy as most individuals take on multiple jobs/roles.
7. Even if I plan to utilize a closed small group approach in the future, the multiplication of groups early in the church’s life is a necessity. Groups may need to multiply long before going through all the stages of group life so new people can have access to group life.
8. God will honor premature multiplication and use it to grow the church and her people.
9. Small groups are the way to close the back door as a church plant can offer few programs that attract and keep guests. Relationships are the key to retaining those who check your church plant out.
10. The senior pastor speaking of his group life journey, encouraging individuals to join a group, and leading one will establish the importance of small groups for years to come.
04.19.10
Divorce, Abuse, and Your Small Group
A few weeks ago I did a weekend teaching. The passage focused on I Corinthians 7: 8 – 23. Verses 10 – 11 demanded I unveil a biblical perspective on divorce. Tough topic, especially when culture contradicts Christ. Culture says, “Divorce if you’re unhappy, unfulfilled, or if your spouse isn’t creating the environment in your home you thought they would.” Christ says, “Do not divorce unless your spouse has been involved with someone else sexually.” I really wish God gave an out when there was physical abuse in the home, but He doesn’t.
As you might imagine, I had people ask about this. My only right response was, “I don’t have the right to add to or take away from Scripture, I as a teacher of God’s Word I can only tell you what it says. I then went on to give a perspective on what should happen when an individual is in an abusive situation. Below you’ll find a very good on-line article from gotQuestions.org. At the end of the article I’ll be giving you a quick list telling the role of a small group when someone in your group is taking the steps suggested in this outstanding article.
Question: "Is abuse an acceptable reason for divorce?"
Answer: While it seems obvious abuse should be an acceptable reason for divorce, the Bible gives only two reasons in which divorce is permitted: the first is in the case of abandonment of a Christian by an unbelieving spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15), and the second is if one partner is involved in a lifestyle of infidelity (Matthew 5:32). Although God allows it in these circumstances, He has never been an endorser of divorce. It should be assumed that two Bible-believing Christians will not mutually agree to divorce, but should practice the forgiveness and love that God freely gives us. “'For I hate divorce!' says the Lord, the God of Israel...” (Malachi 2:16).
The Bible is silent on the issue of marital abuse as a reason for divorce, although it is obvious that God despises the mistreatment of wives by their husbands (Colossians 3:19, 1 Peter 3:7, Ephesians 5:25-33). Abuse should not be tolerated by anyone. No one should have to live in an abusive environment, whether it involves a family member, friend, employer, caregiver, or stranger. Physical abuse is against the law, and the authorities should be the first ones contacted if this occurs.
The best way to prevent ending up feeling trapped in an abusive marriage is to get to know a potential spouse before making the commitment to marry. The signs of being an abuser are manifested in one's personality. These “red flags” are always there, but are often overlooked or even ignored when attraction and infatuation take over. These signs can include: irrational jealousy, the need to be in control, a quick temper, cruelty toward animals, attempts to isolate the other person from his or her friends and family, drug or alcohol abuse, and disrespect for their partner's boundaries, privacy, personal space, or moral values.
A wife who is being abused should get herself, and any children, out of the situation immediately and find a new temporary home. There is nothing in the Bible to indicate that separation (not divorce) in this instance would be wrong. Although friends and family will likely tell the woman to immediately file for divorce, God places a much higher value on marriage than the world does.
Once separated, the abuser has the responsibility to reach out for help. First and foremost, he should seek God. “For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And the door is opened to everyone who knocks” (Matthew 7:8). No one has more power to heal individuals and relationships than God. He must be the Lord of our lives, the Master of our assets, and the Head of our households.
Both husband and wife must commit themselves to God and then develop a relationship with Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. “And this is the way to have eternal life – to know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, the one you sent to earth” (John 17:3). This should be accompanied by intensive Christian counseling – first individually, then as a couple, and even for the entire family if necessary.
During this time, the wife should let her husband know of her unconditional love and support, and devote herself to much prayer. Although the effort must be made on the part of her husband to make the changes, she should not give up hope if he is at first resistant. However, if he never even takes the first step, she should not consider returning to him until he does.
The abused spouse should not return home until a trained Christian counselor decides that the family will be safe in the same home as the former abuser. Together, the couple should then commit to serving and obeying God. They should spend individual time with God daily, attend a Bible-believing church, begin serving God through a ministry, and get involved in small Bible study groups that fit their needs. “What this means is that those who become Christians become new persons. They are not the same anymore, for the old life is gone. A new life has begun” (2 Corinthians 5:17)!
The Small Group May Need to…
1. House the abused spouse and children while the abuser is getting the help he/she needs.
2. Those who are the same gender as the abuser will need to consistently meet she/he for conversations to encourage them to continue counseling, to remind them that there is a light at the end of this very dark tunnel, to do recreational activities with them as they will find themselves in a life of loneliness, and to pray with and for them.
3. Remind both parties that they need to take the time necessary for complete healing to take place. Many times both parties begin to believe they are ready to live together again long before the transformational process is complete.
4. Help with the parenting responsibilities. A single parent isn’t a single parent but she/he will be forced to live as one for a period (perhaps a long period) of time.
5. Pray daily and passionately for God to heal the abuser and restore the heart of the abusee so that, when the couple are back together again, the home God longs for them to have will become a reality.
While this may be one of the heaviest loads a small group carries, it is also one of the most fulfilling. Seeing hearts restored, families rebuilt, and the cycle of abuse broken is a very, very special opportunity for any small group.
04.15.10
Multi-Generational Small Groups: Pros, Cons, and Hurdles to Overcome III
The last few days I’ve communicated some thoughts about multi-generational groups. The last two days I’ve pointed out some awarenesses and telling what the pros and cons are. Today we get practical. Below you’ll find some thoughts concerning how to overcome the obstacles that I mentioned yesterday.
Overcoming the Cons/Hurdles:
· Language barriers… Utilize language understandable to all. When necessary, define for the children what you meant.
· Adults don’t believe they can speak openly with children in the room
1. Subgroup
2. Meet with peers at a time other than the group meeting
· Moms (especially young) need a time to escape parenting responsibilities
1. Consider this schedule for your small group. The first and third week of each month the entire group meets for their regular meeting. The second week of each month the men in the group get together to hang out and they invite a friend who is not yet a follower of Christ. The third week of each month the women in the group get together to hang out and invite a friend who is not yet a follower of Christ. When there is a week five in the month do a cookout or some other relaxed gathering and invite the families of the men and women who spent the evening out with the men the second week of the month or the women the third week of the month.
2. Have the children in the meeting for only part of the meeting time.
· Meetings can be chaotic
1. Make every parent responsible for their own child
2. Have agreed upon expectations of children during the meeting. Each parent is responsible to deal with their child if the child goes beyond the agreed upon boundaries.
3. Embrace the fact, it’s more important for children to be in the room than for the room to be in perfect order
4. Give young children coloring books, etc…
5. When possible, give the children a role to fill, a question to answer, or a responsibility to accomplish
· Discussions must be dumbed down
1. Be willing to do inter-generational for the betterment of the children. Building great Christian kids may need to trump your having a “deep discussion.” By the way… My experience has shown that God sometimes uses children to take the discussion to the deepest levels. Just sayin’…
2. Don’t overlook a child’s ability to learn. Welcome questions and answer them honestly.
3. Remember that the role of the group is secondary to parents in the development of children. Parents may need to explain some things to children after the meeting. The group may be the catalyst for fantastic conversations between children and their parents.
· Teens oftentimes show their disgust with having to be with parents, especially in the rebellious stages
1. Give the teenager room to be silent, to be distant, to be themselves.
2. When possible, give the teen a role that they are willing to fill.
3. Be an encourager to the disgruntled youth.
4. Remind parents (privately) that their teenager doesn’t have to be deeply engaged to be transformed. Seeing adults doing life together will be transforming.
04.14.10
Multi-Generational Small Groups: Pros, Cons, and Hurdles to Overcome II
Yesterday’s blog post started a conversation about multi-generational small groups. If you had a chance to read it you saw some of my thoughts on “classes” and “multi-generational groups.” I thought you might help me process pros and cons.
If you’ve got time, give these a read and comment. I’d be grateful.
Pros of Multi-Generational Groups:
· Modeling (children watching parents do biblical community learn to do so themselves)
· Synergistic/Organic Mentoring (spiritual gifts and experiences of those in the group at work)
· Single parents can connect children to role models (of the opposite gender)
· Stage-up lifestyle learning (preschooler respects the grade schooler, grade schooler respects the pre-teen, the pre-teen respects the teenager, etc…)
· Childcare is no longer an issue
· Parents model communal spiritual disciplines for their children (prayer, studying the Bible, grieving, celebrations, partaking of the Lord’s supper, etc…)
· The nurturing of spiritual gifts at an early age
· During the rebellious stages of life teens will seek out an adult they believe in and trust
Cons/Hurdles of Multi-Generational Groups:
· Language barriers
· Adults don’t believe they can speak openly
· Moms (especially young) need a time to escape parenting responsibilities
· Meetings can be chaotic
· Discussions must be dumbed down
· Teens oftentimes feel very uncomfortable, especially in the rebellious stages
04.13.10
Multi-Generational Small Groups: Pros, Cons, and Hurdles to Overcome
Next week I’ll be leading a session at Exponential Conference in Orlando ( I know, I know. You wish you had a job that sent you to Florida.). The topic… Multi-Generational Small Groups: Pros, Cons, and Hurdles to Overcome. In preparing for this experience I felt it necessary to ask some hard questions about discipleship, especially when it comes to children. Upon asking those questions I knew it was necessary to begin eating away at the elephant in the room… Are disciples best made in “classrooms” or through “relationships?” As you can see, I then felt the need to make a list of thoughts concerning age-graded classes and inter-generational groups.
While I believe both are vital and effective, I’d be thrilled to get your thoughts. Please read the rest of this blog post and comment for me.
What is a disciple?
What is disciple-making?
Can children be disciples?
Can children be discipled?
The Elephant in the room… Are disciples best made in “classrooms” or through “relationships?”
Age-graded Classes… a gathering of individuals in the same stage of learning
· create right learning environments for varying age groups
· in most instances the goal is to dispense and instill information
· utilize well-prepared, age appropriate curriculum for each age group
· one adult is affecting the growth of a given pupil
· the teacher’s only connection to the group may be with the individuals in the classroom (once a week leading pre-determined activities)
· the passion, thoughts, confessions, relational rebuilds, and actions and activities of the teacher may never be known to the pupil
· the pupil does not have a model of adults processing life’s hassles (through God’s words, spiritual gifts at work, the wisdom of those who have already been where another group member is at present, and the miracle of answered prayer)
Inter-Generational Groups… a gathering of individuals of all ages in the process of becoming like Christ
· creates a learning environment that utilizes the experiences of those of all ages, the simplicity of a child’s perspective, and the synergy of old and young in conversation
· the goal is to dispense and instill information and have models of those who are already doing so or are struggling to do so
· utilize well-prepared curriculum that allows those of all ages to tell their stories
· the synergy of the entire group is affecting the growth of each individual
· the leader, and all others in the group, connect between meeting to do life together (the outcome is that the younger group members see the Christian life being lived out rather than attending a weekly meeting)
· the passion, thoughts, confessions, relational rebuilds, and actions and activities of the entire group are modeled for future generations
· the young group member has a model, adults processing life’s hassles (through God’s words, spiritual gifts at work, the wisdom of those who have already been where another group member is at present, and the miracle of answered prayer)
04.12.10
Tweets... 140 or Less Characters That Will Help Your Ministry
Some of you have been asking if I'd blog some of my daily tweets. For those of you who don't know, it is my goal to tweet a sentence or two that you might be able to use to promote small groups, give wisdom to church leaders, or create a conversation. Below you'll find a few past tweets. If you'd like to receive these feel free to join us. My twitter title is rickhowerton.
- Small groups are the perfect place to process God's irresistible grace and His seemingly unrealistic expectations.
- There's a difference between growing the Kingdom and building an organization.
- Being the church is easier and more exciting than doing church.
- The Christian journey is more than a relaxing stroll. It's filled with adventure, battle, beauty, anticipation and is done best in community
- Aloneness is a product of the enemy. Don’t buy it.
- The conversation that takes place around the table after a meal is food for the soul.
- The most dangerous place to go when life is caving in on you is to go it alone.
- The most valuable gift a small group leader can give the group is his\her spiritual story.
- Oftentimes hope is found in the eyes of a fellow follower of Jesus.
- Life’s journey is too beautiful, too exhilarating, too complex, too confusing to travel alone.
- Flaws are common, perfection is not. So why is there a shortage of grace?
- When Jesus becomes the centerpiece of your small group many will find a way to the table.
- Telling your story is the first step on the pathway that leads to the peace Jesus promised.
- Forgiveness is the doorway through which an awareness of the presence of God re-enters a small group.
04.09.10
Over-Utilization of an Under-Defined Term... "Gospel"
Gospel… I have noticed that many pastors are using this wonderful descriptor over and again. In fact, it seems to have eclipsed utilization of the name above all names, Jesus. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have any problem with stating the big G word. In fact, Jesus used the word again and again. But it might be important to use the term wisely.
Consider this… The biblical term “gospel” may be one of the most encouraging and motivating words in all of Scripture. It’s biblical definition is simple enough for anyone to understand… “a good message or good news.” There are other definitions of this term society has embraced. Dictionary.com lists the following definitions.
1. the teachings of Jesus and the apostles; the Christian revelation.
2. the story of Christ's life and teachings, esp. as contained in the first four books of the New Testament, namely Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.
3. (usually initial capital letter
) any of these four books.
4. something regarded as true and implicitly believed: to take his report for gospel.
5. a doctrine regarded as of prime importance: political gospel.
6. glad tidings, esp. concerning salvation and the kingdom of God as announced to the world by Christ.
7. (often initial capital letter
) Ecclesiastical. an extract from one of the four Gospels, forming part of the Eucharistic service in certain churches.
I am psyched (and to be honest, shocked) to see that five of the seven definitions are Christ-focused. Our problem is that most of the people we are talking with (yes, even those who are consistently attending our small group or weekend gatherings) don’t know the biblical definition. When they hear the term “gospel” they are most likely processing the sentence by going back to the most prominent use of the term. Their minds hear phrases that begin with “the gospel of…”. They’ve heard people speak of “the gospel of Karl Marx,” or “the gospel of Chubby,” or “the gospel of Superstank,” (just a few illustrations googling got me).
The listener’s personal definition may be more like, “a personal dogma espoused by an individual.” It’s possible that the person seated on your couch at your group meeting or in the pew at a weekend worship service believes you are espousing some personal dogma rather than unearthing the good news revealed to us through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus. When we use this term without defining it we may create an internal cringe factor rather than emoting a sense of anticipation about the good news we’re speaking of.
Keep this in mind… Every community has a common language. Outsiders don’t know that language. Insiders who don’t know the term may not tell us but they may still be confused. If we’re going to use terms over and again, we need to make sure that everyone is learning the definition of that term. This is true of all our church/Christian-ease. By the way… when unbelievers come to our group or attend our worship gatherings and we dive into the pit of theological terminology, we force them to dive in with us, but they may never join us at a group meeting or church service again. Not knowing the language of the inner circle creates an invisible force field and most people, once they bounce off that force field, conclude they aren’t going to put themselves through that again.
One way to determine if you are overdoing theological terminologies would be to ask yourself the following questions:
- Do unbelievers visit once or twice never to return?
- When I preach or lead the group are unbelievers coming to Christ? If they don’t understand the teaching they certainly can’t embrace what it is being taught.
- When our small group meets, is there a discontenting silence when I ask some questions? If this is true, check yourself. It may be that you’re using theological terms your group members don’t understand.
- Do I ask myself this question when planning to preach, teach, or lead the small group? “What is the level of theological understanding of the person who knows the least about Christianity?” This will help define what terms are appropriate when you are responsible to make the truths found in God’s Word known.
- Concerning the term “gospel,”… Compared to the number of times I use this term, how often do I speak the name of Jesus? The term gospel may insinuate the good news of Jesus but it is only through His name (which means savior, deliverer) that we can be saved. (Acts 4:12)
One last thought… If you’ve read this blog post and have concluded, “Howerton is out of his mind… again,” at least consider adding these words after saying the word gospel… “of Jesus Christ.” At least the listener will know whose gospel we’re dogmatically declaring.
04.08.10
The Best Description of a Small Group Member/Friend I've Seen
I have searched many years for a paragraph that would describe the relationship small group members embody. Like many of you, I have the responsibility to paint the relational picture so those considering group life know what they are getting into. While the following paragraph doesn’t occur in every group it is the ideal. Hopefully, over time group members will have the kind of relationship described below with a few in the group they are part of.
If you are a small group pastor you’ll find this paragraph to be very useful.
What is a friend? Friends are people with whom you dare to be yourself. Your soul can be naked with them. They ask you to put on nothing, only to be what you are. They do not want you to be better or worse. When you are with them, you feel as a prisoner feels who has been declared innocent. You do not have to be on your guard. You can say what you think, as long as it is genuinely you. Friends understand those contradictions in your nature that lead others to misjudge you. With them you breathe freely. You can avow your little vanities and envies and hates and vicious sparks, your meannesses and absurdities, and in opening them up to friends, they are lost, dissolved on the white ocean of their loyalty. They understand. You do not have to be careful. You can abuse them, neglect them, tolerate them. Best of all, you can keep still with them. It makes no matter. They like you. They are like fire that purges to the bone. They understand. You can weep with them, sing with them, laugh with them, pray with them. Through it all--and underneath--they see, know, and love you. A friend? What is a friend? Just one, I repeat, with whom you dare to be yourself.
C. Raymond Beran
04.06.10
What I Learned about Small Group Leadership from my Drama Profs
Chinese leader, Li Hung Chang once said, "There are only three kinds of people in the world -- those who are immovable, those who are movable, and those who move them." Leaders are those who can move people, they direct followers to greatness.
Throughout high school and college I was involved in theater productions. The roles I’ve taken on are as diverse as becoming “Corndoggie,” a takeoff on the 1950’s, to “Curly,” one of the roles in the classical musical, Oklahoma. Both of these were lead roles, roles I was certain I was incapable of doing well. Now let me tell ya’, I wasn’t the most intelligent guy in the world. Memorization has always been more than a miraculous affair for me. And I certainly wasn’t that talented. But I was willing to allow a leader who cared about the heart of me to direct the soul of me. While my peers would’ve never known it, I was an emotionally paralyzed person longing to have surgery done on his heart. And these directors did just that. And when they did, they led me down “paths of righteousness,” (Psalm 23:3), safe places where the power of God could be released from me.
Small Group leaders need to understand that many of the people they will lead don’t believe in themselves. They need a leader who sees potential in them and is willing to do what it takes to direct them to become all they were created to be.
Looking into the drama of my relationship with these directors I see that the script they utilized to bring my heart to new levels of anticipation and exhilaration included five acts that I believe need to be played out by every small group leader in relation to every small group member. And when they are, that small group leader will have a team willing to follow him wherever the journey takes them.
Act I: Potential: See potential in every small group member.
Act II: Relationship: Build a meaningful relationship with every small group member.
Act III: Reveal Potential: Great small group leaders reveal the potential they see in each small group member to each group member.
Act IV: Mentoring: The small group leader does all in his power to help each small group member reach their full potential.
Act V: Empowerment: The group leaders sets each small group member free to flourish.
04.01.10
Conflict and the Cross...Gaining Perspective
Conflict can kill a small group and can cripple a local church to the point she walks with a limp for decades.
Today is Good (or Dark) Friday. We Christians are celebrating (or grieving) the crucifixion of Christ.
There was one moment in history when Jesus had the possibility of being in conflict with others at a level of intensity no one else ever will. He was on the cross. Think about it. His conflict could have been, had He been like you and me, as thick as a blinding fog. Due to Jesus carrying all of our sins He was at odds with His Father. Jesus’ closest friends had left Him high and dry, alone in His most traumatic moments. The Roman soldiers surrounding Him had beaten Jesus, placed Him on a cross, driven a crown of thorns through the flesh surrounding His skull and ridiculed Him with a sign of sarcasm reading “King of the Jews.” The crowd hurled insults at Him and even one of the criminals being crucified with Him was demeaning to Jesus.
In my pain I would have most likely cursed every person on the planet, those who had existed from the Garden of Eden on. After all, if I were Jesus I would have known every one of them and I would be vividly aware that the pain I was suffering was due to their sins, not mine. But not Jesus. In fact, His words were, “Father, forgive them…” (Luke 23:34)
If Jesus could forgive us shouldn’t we forgive anyone for anything? Remember these words that come directly from Christ while hanging on that cross… “…if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matthew 6:14-15) Now that’s PERSPECTIVE! You think someone has sinned? It would be to your best interest to forgive them.
Don’t allow the greatest moment in human history to be overlooked. Ask yourself who it is that you are angry with or disappointed in. Pray a simple prayer then take the steps in that prayer. Your prayer might go something like this… “Father, I’m hacked at _________________________ (fill in the blank or, if necessary make a list). Please forgive me for my attitude towards them. Help me to realize down deep in my being that the issue is not more important than our relationship with one another and it is certainly not more important than the unity of my small group or church. Please give me the courage to call them. I realize that the only way I’m going to be at peace with them is if I speak with them and ask them to forgive me for my thoughts about them. Even if they don’t forgive me, thank you for clearing my conscience and setting me free from the bitterness I’ve been feeling. I assure You, I will do my best to live at peace with everyone from this point on. Amen.”
The only person you’ll hack off is the only enemy we’re suppose to have, Satan himself.
