07.15.10
A Candid Conversation with a Mega-Church Pastor Who Didn't Affair Proof His Marriage IV
Over the last three days you've been engaged in a candid interview with Brad Johnson, a mega-church pastor who lost everything due to his decision to engage in a relationship with a woman other than his wife. The first day we heard from him concerning the internal battle he did not win. On day two we heard from him concerning the affects of his sin. Yesterday ideas, perspectives, and thoughts on biblical expectations were exposed. Today I asked Brad to give us words of wisdom, practical advice for each of us.
Rick: What would you to say to the minister, anyone actually, who is considering crossing that line?
Brad: Confess your struggle to a Christian friend of the same sex, immediately enter into a relationship with a reputable Christian therapist and take EVERY RADICAL STEP necessary to be as far from any whiff of temptation that is possible. FLEE the temptation.
Rick: What would you suggest others do so that they don't cross the line and find themselves on the other side of one of the worst decisions of their lives?
Brad: Truthfulness is the key. Be honest with yourself, with your struggles, with your needs, with your fears, with your pain. Deal with issues that have haunted you, likely for years. Don't believe the lies that it's safe, just fun or harmless. Refuse to buy the lie that you will not cross the line. You will.
Rick: What else would you like to say to any married person about divorce, how to keep from finding yourself in an affair, etc…?
Brad: If it can happen to me and many, many people stronger, wiser and more spiritually mature than me....IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU. This is not a game. The consequences are devastating. You are a fool to know about my life and continue on a road that would find you where I have been. I would BEG you with all that is within me to live honorably, to keep no secrets, and to put behavioral boundaries around your life that might even seem extreme. Your lasting marriage is worth every effort you invest to save it.
Rick: For those of us who want to be there for you and others in your situation, what would you suggest to us?
Brad: Be available. Be generous. Be merciful. Do not fear being perceived as being soft of sin or unwise. Kindness is a command. Gentleness is a fruit of the Spirit. And when a person begins a journey back to the Father, celebrate every step. Take risks to publically stand with them. Use your influence to help open doors so that they may have opportunity to live the life they desire to live for Jesus Christ.
Rick: Brad, would you be willing to address this issue in churches, before church groups, men's groups, or share your story, if you are invited?
Brad: Yes, I am most certainly open to speaking, teaching, or being interviewed. If you sense Brad could be of service to your church feel free to contact him at bradsj@gmail.com; 805-208-2272 or his current ministry location, www.lifechangecommunity.org
For those of us who have "fallen", we need to remember that the way we interact with the church can not be a one-trick pony sort of thing. I have a testimony. I have a past, a turning point, a victory to share. But, Brad, myself and so many others are more than that one "great' story. Hopefully, we have a total package to share with the Body of Christ. Thank you again Brad for sharing. but also for getting back on that pony.. and riding
I have had the pleasure of knowing Brad from his days in Kentucky. He was a great friend and an incredible part of our Sermon Study group. My heart was broken for him when I learned of his "failure". But what I found more devastating was the treatment he was receiving from some in the "body of Christ".
While I understand the feelings of some, and they are certainly entitled to them. The blogging of hate was in no way shape or form Christlike. That sin which is likely ongoing is as damaging to the body as was Brads.
I have been praying for Brad and rejoice to see how God is restoring and using him. I personally appreciate how God turns our hurts, failures, and even our sins into ministry. There's a word for that - GRACE. Maybe that's why we call it AMAZING!
God bless you my friend!