The first day of spring is March 20!  I don’t know about you, but I am SO glad. Winter is my least favorite season (as you know if you keep up with me on Twitter or Facebook!) Spring brings such an awakening of all things for me.

As you think about new things, fresh starts and moving into a new season, how are you preparing as a leader? Are you thinking about things you still have yet to learn? Perhaps you are looking for ideas for reading.

Jaye Martin, women’s program leader at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, Louisville, KY, has graciously shared with us the Bibliography for Ministering to Women compiled by the Women’s Leadership Office at Southern. As we continue to grow as leaders of women, we must continue to sharpen our minds and hearts in various areas that I think you will see on this list.

Blessings as you read!

Clocks are about to “spring” forward. Are you ready? I am looking forward to longer days (or at least longer daylight hours even if I can’t add a few hours to the day!). But even when it’s not time change weekend, our lives are in continually change.

How many of you are facing or have recently faced a major change in your life?  Don’t we prefer lives to follow traditional pattern.  You know, life the way it's supposed to be: birth, childhood, school, college, job, marriage, family, retirement, aging, and death.  In that order!  Right!

Truly I am a creature of habit, very comfortable with routines, plan A as opposed to plan B, and a somewhat predictable life.  Of course, that is not the life I’ve experienced for the most part. I have discovered that interruptions to that “perfect” order can be disturbing. Often we work hard to get past barriers and obstacles in order to get on with life as we think it's supposed to be (whatever that is!).

Life rarely works out the way we think it will and we face inevitable changes, times of struggle, pain, joy and growth.  Some of these are ordinary and others turn world upside down. All are opportunities for growth, for God to “show off”, to grow in all ways, and to develop a story that ministers to others.

So, how do you deal with change, especially with crisis and difficulties that cause change, such as death of a loved one, illness, job loss, broken relationships……
 

In an old book Future Shock  this statement was made: "Change is avalanching upon our heads and we are grotesquely unprepared to cope with it."  Change can be frightening because we don't know what result will be and we tend to be afraid of the unknown. Change disrupts our routine and brings unpredictability into our journey.  The question not whether we will have change, but how we will react to changes we will definitely have. 

Chuck Kelley, president of New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary once made the statement "Change is inevitable, but adjustment of optional." So how can we face change with grace and joy and accept it as natural, healthy, spiritual growth opportunity in life?

In Experiencing God this is called a crisis of belief. We can't do it on own but it becomes a turning point where we must make a decision and what we do reveals what we believe about God. The author, Henry Blackaby, says, "You can't stay where you are and go with God"  God's revelation is our invitation to adjust our life to Him. The tendency is to skip adjustment (process of growth) and go from believing to obedience, but if we want to follow Him, we don't have that choice. We must be willing to pay price of adjustment to follow His will.

We must focus on our unchangeable God because at every change point in our lives, He has important things to teach us about ourselves and others, and most importantly, about who He is: the only one who is changeless, constant and perfect. James 1:17 says, Every generous act and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights; with Him there is no variation or shadow cast by turning. We also know that His Word never changes (Matthew 24:35, Psalm 119:89)


Here are some practical tips for dealing with change:
1.  Let change happen-recognize and understand change is normal.
2.  Realize anxiety is normal as well!
3.  Don't keep feelings to self but open lines of communication and share what’s on your heart.
4.  Rely on others for support.
5.  Be active and stay healthy physically and nutritionally.
6.  Let go of old and look forward to new as you focus on what gained, not just what is lost.


Proverbs 3:5-6 is a familiar passage, but one that truly does give us an anchor to hold to when we are not sure what’s going on. Continually withdraw to spend time with Him when life gets out of focus and you aren’t sure what’s about to happen. Learn to praise him in the midst of uncertainty.

Philippians 4:4 tells us to rejoice when????  Keep a surrendered will, just as Jesus did in the garden before his crucifixion. Claim His promises that speak to you during your journey and you will ALWAYS find him faithful.

What do you do to navigate change in your life? Share your tips in the comments.

 

About every 2 weeks our women's training and event team meets for what we call Marriage Monday.  Sometimes it’s Marriage Monday on Thursday due to our schedules, but the purpose is the same no matter what day it may fall.   We have used for part of our discussion, Shaunti Feldhahn’s book, For Women Only.  She used extensive research with men to write about 7 key needs for a man.

 The first issue we addressed was the man’s need for respect, even above love.  For him, respect shows love.  Shaunti says that, “Men would rather feel unloved than inadequate and disrespected.” Ephesians 5 seems to confirm this when it says that women are to respect their husband, not love him!  As women we want to sometimes control things which indicates to the man that we do not trust him to handle them.

 Now I don’t know about you, but I know I often do not show my husband the respect that he needs and deserves.

 Shaunti tells us to respect his judgment instead of always questioning his ideas. I remember when Pat and I first got married, I questioned every decision he made. I always had a better way of doing something. Winning each battle was important to me since “I was surely right!”  Shaunti says we are to respect his abilities to figure things out for himself. She also tells us to respect him through our communication, and maybe one of the most important ones, respect him in public. I always hate to see women put their husbands down in front of others. It makes me wonder how she talks to him in private!     This past January, my mom passed away after several years of ill health.  During those years, I had taken care of mom and all her business for several years so when she died, I immediately went into planning mode from funeral arrangements, to travel arrangements for our family to head to West Texas for the funeral, and all other details in between. When I went into “take charge” mode, I stayed in it.  After the funeral, without my conscious awareness, I’d begun bossing my husband. It was just so hard to turn it off after having to deal with all the funeral arrangements and make the decisions. At one point, I was “directing” him to tell my sister goodbye at the hotel the night before she was flying back home.  He quickly let me know I’d ordered him around enough!  When I innocently asked him what he was talking about, he explained how I had been acting toward him.  Only then did I realize that I’d really left him out of things and had treated  him disrespectfully…and in front of other family members! I had not meant to do it, but sometimes we aren’t aware that how we talk to and about our spouses has a huge impact on them.

 She concludes the chapter on respect with this comment, “Just as we love to hear “I love you,” a man’s heart is powerfully touched by a few simple words: “I’m so proud of you.” 

My husband is a great handyman. He can fix almost anything and has saved us thousand of dollars in repair bills over the 38+ years we’ve been married.  Every time he does, I go on about it, not just to make him feel good, although I want him to feel good, but because I really am grateful he can fix so many things. I talk to women all the time whose husbands don’t fix anything around the house. We actually have a friend that has to borrow my husband’s screwdriver! 

 If you are married, tell your husband today how proud you are of him. If you are single, what other men in your life can you tell?  A father? A son? A brother? A fiancé or boyfriend? Don’t wait till later, do it now!

How do you show respect to the men in your life?

Watch for upcoming Marriage Monday conversation!

Check out LifeWay’s Marriage Events. 

Festival of Marriage ;  Toward a Growing Marriage; The Great Marriage Experience

Listen to what some young adult women are saying. How does this help you as you reach and lead young women into the future?

What Young Women are Saying #3 from Chris Adams on Vimeo.

You may also want to check out this article on connecting young women into the Women's Ministry.

What are YOU doing to reach young women?

I am sure you have many women and other family members in your church who have loved ones in the military. If you live near military bases you have even more opportunity to minister to these wives. 

Sara Horn is the founder of Wives of Faith and the author of GOD Strong: A Military Wife’s Spiritual Survival Guide.   

She has a heart for military wives, partially because she is one. Click here to read her article on how we can make a difference for these women. 

Sara will also be a part of our 2010 Women’s Forum at Ridgecrest as she shares more ideas with women’s leaders.

How are you ministering to military wives?