Guest blogger Lorie Looney Keene shares a fresh thought about mentoring…perhaps something you haven’t thought about!  Perhaps after reading this you will think about using your church nursery as a place for mentoring others!

My church has experienced a recent outbreak of pregnancies.  Many of my friends, as well as myself, will be having another child in 2012.  It begin with just a couple ‘special announcements’ and began to spread seemingly everywhere.  So much so, that we are actually in the process of moving our church nursery to accommodate the impending arrivals. :)

We are all very excited about the arrival of these new mini members, and I have been very blessed to see people begin to step up and take on more nursery duties at church.  Typically, I have seen nursery workers to be young mothers doing there expected volunteer service and teenagers who enjoy playing with the babies. What has impressed me the most at my current church, however, is the number of senior adult women who are willingly signing up for ‘diaper duty.’

Some of these ladies have grandchildren of their own. Others, have none. A few have children who live out of town. A couple have family close by.  Regardless of their varied personal experiences, they are all volunteering to come rock babies who, for the most part, have no physical tie to them.  This is not a mandated duty. But rather, one motivated out of love.

I am thrilled by this, because it allows the moms a chance to sit and rock nearby seasoned mothers who usually can’t wait to get their hands on your baby. It is an added comfort to see your little one nestle up to a worn lap who has cradled many children and be held by hands who lovingly pat them to sleep.  This time also allows a natural environment for mentoring to occur. 

Titus 2 encourages women to teach other women how to love their children. Such an environment allows that teaching to occur without having to always use words. A gentle touch, a reminder that someone understands your exhaustion, a smile at the perfect time aides in teaching ‘younger’ moms that they are neither alone in the process of raising their children, as well as, they have women around them who love them.

If your church nursery does not currently include a span of ages in its workers, consider requesting that senior adult women (who are physically capable) volunteer some of their time. Some ideas for ways to recruit them are:

 1.  Remind them of how important they are to young mothers.  Just because they have raised their children, they are still needed as mentors.

2. Encourage them to use their ability to rock a baby, feed a baby or simply be an adult presence in the room is very valuable.

3. Share with them the precious opportunity God may be giving them to befriend a young mother and pass on their experiences in mothering.

Lorie Looney Keene earned both a Masters of Divinity in Christian Education and a Masters of Theology (Th.M) from Southern Seminary, where she worked for three years as The Assistant Director of Women's Programs.  Prior to working at Southern Seminary, Lorie served in Poland with the International Mission Board and has over seven years experience as an ER nurse.  She is the author of "Pull Up A Chair: You Me, and the Gospel of John" by New Hope Publishing, as well as a contributing author to Journey Magazine  . Lorie lives in Tullahoma, TN where her husband, Stephen is the Youth/Education Minister at Highland Baptist Church . She is a Sunday School teacher to HighSchool girls, leads a weekly women's Bible study and teaches Biology at her church's homeschool co-op.  Currently, Lorie is enjoying the role of stay at home mom to her 2 year old son, Elijah.

Leighann McCoy helps us get our year off to a great start with this encouraging message about what doesn’t change in women’s ministry. We have no idea what is ahead for us personally or for our women’s ministry in 2012 so it’s nice to know a few things about ministry to women that stays static!  Remember, outside these 3 things, there is lots of room for tweaking and even “chunking” elements of the way we’ve always done it!  Enjoy Leighann’s thoughts!

I don’t know about you, but as a women’s ministry leader I’ve spent the past few years reeling in what felt like a rip tide of change. I went to conferences where I heard that women are looking for authenticity and purpose. I read blog posts where they begged us to stop hosting our decorated banquets, and I sat in staff meetings where I was challenged to give up women’s Bible studies as I knew them so that we could simplify our programs.

I’ve never actually been in a rip tide, but I’ve studied the posters planted in the sand on Florida’s panhandle beaches. And according to their instructions the only way to survive a riptide is to “go with the flow” rather than fight against it to swim directly back to shore—you just swim with the current a bit until the force no longer pushes against you. Rip tides do not expand the entire width of the beach and eventually you will get beyond them and be able to make your way to shore without any resistance at all.

I swam with the tide of change for two years and just let the women’s ministry at my church carry on. But this past fall I discovered that I’d made it to the edge of my sanctified rip tide. As I set my feet on the soggy sand of the shore I realized that no matter what changes come in 2012, these three things will remain the same:

1.      Women will always need one another.

2.      Women will always find answers in God’s Word.

3.      Women will always love chocolate.

Women will always need one another. We’d stopped having our retreats three years ago. But as I was speaking to a small group of women gathered in the Zion National Park in Utah, I remembered why we used to have retreats. All over the room women were chatting in small groups of 2 and 3 and sharing their stories. They were connecting more than they ever would over a Styrofoam cup of coffee on a Sunday morning. Sharing soup and crackers Friday night and cut up bananas and oranges Saturday morning created an atmosphere where ministry took place. Women were sharing things they’d kept hidden for years. Others were confessing fears about their near and distant futures. God was working. I’m not saying that the only way to foster an atmosphere for women to connect is to host a retreat, but it’s a good way! As for me and my house…we’re having a retreat the first weekend of February in 2012.

Women will always find answers in God’s Word. We know how God speaks to us through His Word. But do the women we serve know what a treasure they have in the Word of God? Unfortunately for us, Bible study has been diluted to about 35 minutes on a Sunday morning with a teacher who studied 45 minutes Saturday night and delivers her insights to women she barely knows as they perch on cold metal chairs spread across the expanse of a white walled room.  In 2012 I am gathering 8 women in my home. Together we are going to work through the chronological study Bible so that we can have a comprehensive understanding of this amazing collection of books we call “God’s Word.” THEN, in 2013 each of those women will gather at least 5 women in their homes and do the same thing. In 2014 each of those 40 women will gather 5 and by 2015, 1000 women in the reach of our ministry will have read the Bible through in a year and have a personal experience with the Word of God.

Women will always love chocolate. Praise God from whom all blessings flow! He has given us all that we need to entice and encourage women to connect with one another and with Him. Many years ago when I wasn’t that terribly concerned with trends and statistics, I led our women’s ministry to host a chocolate buffet. We dressed to the hilt and served chocolate and encouraged the women at our church to connect with one another and to sign up for Bible studies. It worked, so we’re doing it again. I figure that if back then, when the only M&M candies we could serve were either plain or peanut, then surely now when we can serve plain, peanut, pretzel, cinnamon, coconut, peanut butter, dark and milk, then chocolate can still be one of our best women’s ministry friends.

I hope that you have plans to lead the women you love to connect with one another and with God’s Word in 2012. And I hope that you will savor some chocolate along the way.

Resources:

Chronological Bible Discipleship

Readers Guide to the Bible Chronological Reading Plan

Leighann is a graduate of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. She is the senior pastor's wife at Thompson Station Church, Thompson Station, Tennessee, a mother of three, a LifeWay Ministry Multiplier and a writer and speaker. Currently, she serves on staff at Thompson Station Church as the prayer and women's minister, and is a frequent speaker at women's events and prayer conferences. Throughout her ministry, she has served in several denominational positions relating to children and women's ministries. She is the author of nine books, most recently being Spiritual Warfare for Women, published by Bethany House. In addition to her website and personal blog, you can read more about her ministry here.

Lorie Looney Keene shares a fresh approach to mentoring and play dates. Consider this when you are seeking ways to connect the generations of women in your church.

    I have been comfortable teaching women's Bible study classes, helping with events, doing young women's mentoring for many years now. Recently, however, God has been redesigning my concept of ministering to women. He has been developing in me a love for older women.

   We have several senior adult couples in my church who, for various reasons, do not have any biological grandchildren. Several of these couples have become very fond of Elijah. So, rather than just having 'play dates' with other young moms in the church, I have also been scheduling play dates with several of the older ladies as well. Recently, Elijah and I spent the morning at the home of an older lady who was so excited to have a child play in her yard again. We now go there once a month.

   In addition, I've watched a couple of the ladies recently lose their husbands. I had been especially close to one of the couples and was caught off guard when I received a phone call in Kroger with her crying on the phone asking me to please 'come over and see if her husband was in a coma because he wasn't responding to her.' I went to her home, held the hand of a dying man with cancer, and helped her come to grips with the idea of enlisting Hospice care. He passed away 5 days later.

   All this to say, God is really growing me in my idea of what it means to love on women in my church. I am blessed with many women my age and absolutely LOVE them...but I'm realizing the added blessing of also building relationships with those of older decades.

   As women in the younger generations, we have such a unique opportunity to minister not only to one another, but to women who have walked longer miles in similar shoes.  We are wise to include older generations in our normal life routines.  The wisdom and experiences gleaned from them is invaluable.  Some ways that you may begin to include various generations in your life include:

1.   Adopt an older lady in your church as a second ‘grandmother’ to your child.  Children can never have too many people loving on them!

2.  Take time to develop a real friendship with a woman at least a few decades your senior.  Ask her to share her mothering experiences and favorite pieces of advice.  You may be amazed at how much she can relate to you.

3.  Schedule a ‘play date’ for you and your child/children to spend some time at the home of a senior adult woman. 

   Prayerfully ask the Lord how He wants to beginning tying together some generations of women in your church. You will become much the richer for the experience.

Lorie Looney Keene earned both a Masters of Divinity in Christian Education and a Masters of Theology (Th.M) from Southern Seminary, where she worked for three years as The Assistant Director of Women's Programs.  Prior to working at Southern Seminary, Lorie served in Poland with the International Mission Board and has over seven years experience as an ER nurse.  She is the author of "Pull Up A Chair: You, Me and the Gospel of John (LINK)" by New Hope Publishing, as well as a contributing author to Journey Magazine  . Lorie lives in Tullahoma, TN where her husband, Stephen is the Youth/Education Minister at Highland Baptist Church . She is a Sunday School teacher to HighSchool girls, leads a weekly women's Bible study and teaches Biology at her church's homeschool co-op.  Currently, Lorie is enjoying the role of stay at home mom to her 2 year old son, Elijah.

 

Categories: Leading Young Women, Reaching Women, Top Ten for the Generations
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Today’s guest blogger is my friend Margaret Kennedy, a Biblical retreat and conference speaker, who also has a call for mentoring young women on her life. Read her message to us to make sure we focus on the relationships God brings into our ministries and our lives. As we begin this year together, let’s evaluate how we might better  foster “togetherness”!

Remember the popular TV show “Cheers”?  It was a bar scene where regulars would come daily to sit and chat.  Ever wonder what drew them there?  The lyrics to the theme song tell us the drawing card: “Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got. Taking a break from all your worries sure would help a lot. Wouldn't you like to get away? Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad you came. You wanna be where you can see, our troubles are all the same. You wanna be where everybody knows your name.”

Chuck Swindoll says: “The neighborhood bar is possibly the best counterfeit there is to the fellowship Christ wants to give His Church.  It’s an imitation, dispensing liquor instead of grace, escape rather than reality.  But it is a permissive, accepting, and inclusive fellowship. The bar flourishes not because most people are alcoholics, but because God has put into the human heart the desire to know and be known, to love, and be loved, and so many seek a counterfeit at the price of a few beers.”

My burden is this: as women’s ministry leaders, are we aware of this lack of connection, though we are rooted and grounded in Christ? Over the last year, most of the churches in which I have spoken or done leadership consultation have asked me address this very issue.  How can we help the women in our church to connect with one another?

Through technology, busyness, and self-centeredness, we are losing personal touch with one another.  Our world, while offering opportunities for forming merely surface relationships, is leaving little time for cultivating deeper connections in Christ. 

God created us for community.  God has given us what I often call “The Gift of Togetherness” to meet this need.  Scripture teaches us that we are fellow workers, helpers, labourers, prisoners, sufferers, etc.  The word “fellow” means this: “together with, implying a nearer and closer connection, a more intimate relationship as Jesus Christ has with us. This is more than the word ”meta” which means “amid or among, merely in company with.”  This word for fellow, sun, is used 127 times in the NT, telling us how we are to be closely connected. I think of us as being “sun sisters”. 

So, I believe the need will be answered only when we as women’s leaders intentionally institute methods, programs, and plans that promote this “Gift of Togetherness”.   How can we do that in the coming year?

1. Recognize and address the need of our women to be accepted and connected as a women’s ministry team.  Make your women at large aware of this inborn need. 

2. Assess where your women are in your fellowship.  Which best describes the relationships of your women.  Are they “fellows” or merely “amid” one another.

3. Is the opportunity being afforded for them to truly connect with one another?   Or do they merely meet, greet, eat, and depart in the same manner they came. 

Intentionality will be the key to meeting this need in your women’s lives.

Because I teach a large ladies class that schedule only affords 1 hour a week for cultivating close connections, the leaders in my class formed 4 small groups, inviting them into my home for food and fellowship.  Our goal was to make each woman feel accepted and connected.  It worked well.  Used the same menu, same table talk questions, and centered our group discussion on Hebrews 10:24.

Our Women’s ministry team is piloting a program that will connect older women and younger women, by using Woman to Woman Mentoring and Apples of Gold resources.

Accountability opportunities are opening up for women to form small accountability groups, using Heart Friends resource.

A sister church is beginning a series of small gatherings in individual homes, entitling it “The Bridge”, for the purpose of connecting with each other in preparation for connecting with the world. I held a training session beforehand for the leaders on “Telling God’s Story Your Way”. Then a different leader was asked to begin each “Bridge” gathering by sharing her story.

Hebrews 10:24 encourages us to “consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.” 

Until we are closely connected in the body of Christ, we will never bring those outside into the fold though their hearts experience the same need as ours:  to love and be loved, to be accepted and connected.

 Ladies, let us make sure that our assembling this next year includes appropriating our “Gift of Togetherness”! Tell us in the comments below what you are doing to create community for your women, a place where "everybody knows their name".

Karen Doyel shares a heartfelt experience regarding mentoring. Be blessed by this guest post today!

"One generation shall praise Your works to another, And shall declare Your mighty acts"

Psalm 145:3-5

As we serve the women God brings into our lives, I am reminded of the wonderful women God brought to minister and serve me.  My life has been blessed with mentors when I did not even know I was being mentored. My sweet grandmother wet my appetite for God’s word as a 6 year old girl.  I spent the night with her and we slept together in her big feather bed.  It was such a treat to have my grandmother all to myself.

As we settled in for the night, she began to tell me a story of a young boy who left home and ended up eating pig food!  She went into great detail and I was captivated by this young boy and the mess he was in.  Of course, my favorite part was the happy ending!  As she finished the story she told me it was a story in the Bible!  Now I was really shocked!  I could not wait to tell my parents and could not wait to hear another story.  That began my hunger to know more about my God.

I wonder if you are sharing with the women around you.  Are you giving them an appetite for God’s word?  Are you seeking women who give you an appetite for God’s word?

A young wife and her husband took Doug and I into their home once a week during our engagement and let us watch them relate, cook, take care of their children and fed us!.  They then separated us and each took time to teach us how to be a Godly wife and husband.  What a blessing!

Another woman took me with her when she visited homebound people and I watched her love.  I was taught how to be a pastor’s wife, by my pastor’s wife.  She took time to share, but more importantly she walked the walk of a loving supportive wife in front of me.

I was even blessed to be taught how to be a widow when I had no idea I was going to be a widow.  A wonderful elderly lady asks me to her home on a consistent basis and shared her life with me.  Never did I suspect she was teaching me how to be a Godly widow.

This is just a short list of the women God has brought into my life and I pray that I will not forget and be always willing to speak into the lives of the women around me. 

What are you teaching?  Are you being intentional in bringing up the next generation?

There are wonderful tools out there if you need help. Women Mentoring Women by Janet Thompson is one of them.  Take time to check it out.

Karen is a writer for the Tennessee Baptist Convention Ministers’ Wives blog .She is a speaker and conference leader, former pastor’s wife, and LifeWay Ministry Multiplier from Lenoir City, TN. Karen was married to Dr. Douglas R. Alexander, former pastor of First Baptist Church, Lenoir City, Tennessee until his untimely death a few years ago. They served in ministry in Texas, New Mexico, Arkansas, Ohio and Tennessee. Karen established and led women’s ministries in each church she attended and is a conference leader and writes and teaches Bible studies. She especially has a heart for ministers’ wives and wants to help them love their special calling in ministry. Karen is married to Jim Doyel and is the mother of three grown sons.