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Life Lessons
You can read Random Thoughts Part 1 and Random Thoughts Part 2 that were previous posts.
Here are more thoughts, leader to leader. Most of these come on a daily email I get from a friend here at LifeWay. Sometimes I get them and they stop me in my tracks. I just have to save and re-read each one. Comments in italics are my own musings about the thoughts. I pray these will bless you as well, especially during the rush of this holiday season.
1. “There are no disappointments to those whose will is buried in the will of God.” (Frederick William Faber) This is what the Lord, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel says: I am the Lord your God, who teaches you for [your] benefit, who leads you in the way you should go. Isaiah 48:17 (HCSB) Please help me to see from your perspective and desire your will, Lord, rather than getting my own way.
2. “The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” (Kahlil Gibran) But even if I am poured out as a drink offering on the sacrifice and service of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. Phil 2:16-17 (HCSB) Teach me more about you in each sorrow I face. Thank you that sorrow turns into joy in your timing and through your grace.
3. “Christ was never in a hurry. There was no rushing forward, no anticipating, no fretting over what might be. Each day’s duties were done as each day brought them, and the rest was left with God.” (Mary Slessor) So when He heard that he was sick, He stayed two more days in the place where He was. Then after that, He said to the disciples, “Let’s go to Judea again.” John 11:5-7 (HCSB) Lord, as I begin to “hurry” through this holiday season, trying to get it all done, please help me remember how you lived life and served the Kingdom!
4. “Complaining is the absolute worst possible thing you could do for your health. The worst!...For the next 7 days, I challenge you not to complain at all.” (T. Harv Eker) Do everything without grumbling and arguing, so that you may be blameless and pure, children of God who are faultless in a crooked and perverted generation, among whom you shine like stars in the world. Phil 2:14-15 (HCSB) May I learn to stop complaining so I can shine like stars in your world, even if everyone else around me is complaining!
I pray these will speak to you not only as you read today, but as you go through the holidays and face maybe some challenging days and schedules!
Helpful Resources:
Whispers of Hope, Beth Moore
Journey (devotional magazine for women)
One of the questions our leadership panel received at the 2010 forum was this: How do you deal with a season of feeling like a clogged drain? Your head understands, you walk in obedience, you trust, but the flame is flickering. I am walking daily and refusing to give in to discouragement, but it seems like a struggle. I have more struggle days than non. Now, now many of you reading this have felt just like this? If you have been serving long at all you know that there are highs and lows in our spiritual journey. Sometimes you are floating above the mundane and learning new and exciting principles that impact your spiritual live daily. Other seasons, you feel like you are reading the Word, praying and yet there seems to be no progress. I tell my women’s small group at church often, “Can you at least see a little progress?”
If you are like me, you’d love to grow spiritually in leaps and bounds all the time. You’d love to say and do exactly what Jesus would want you to do. And sometimes you feel as though that is happening. But other times it seems like nothing at all is happening. Guess what…that is SO normal!
So, what do we do when we have a clogged drain and it is a dry season? First of all, you keep doing what you KNOW to do-stay in the Word, trust the truth not the feelings, listen to inspirational CDs and worship music, and pray continually. It would be really helpful to also get an accountability partner and ask them to pray for and with you.
Perhaps you could take a spiritual retreat for a day, a weekend or even a week. Many leaders have spent this kind of “quiet” time seeking God’s hand in their life and ministry. Many come away not only refreshed but with a rekindled vision for the spiritual journey they are on.
You may only see small baby steps of progress, but persist even when it’s hard. If you give up, you give the enemy the victory. His desire is to defeat you daily!
I remember during an especially dry ministry and spiritual season, I continued seeking HIM more than I was seeking an answer to the difficult situation. I felt like I was just barely treading water and not making any progress at all. As I sought HIM primarily, He began to teach me new aspects of His character. I developed an even deeper walk with Him. But what if I’d given up before that point? I would have missed this deeper life in Him. Don’t give up! He hasn’t moved at all. He knows right where you are and He cares enough to walk with you every step of the way. Believe Him!
Helpful resources:
Believing God
Knowing God by Name
Discerning the Voice of God
Me Myself and Lies
This is such a timely message from guest blogger and women’s ministry leader ,Deb Douglas. Take each thought she shares to heart this December! You will be blessed and you will bless others.
Last year’s December calendar still haunts me. A solid month with only one un-booked night turned me from Minister to Women to Minister Monster! Christmas season starts in November at my church. The first event is over and I am bracing myself for the parade of events through December. Like most churches, the December calendar for my church looks like a tangle of computer wiring. As leaders, we can be robbed of the opportunity to be recharged with the sweetness of the Christmas season by busy-ness.
How can we survive an impossible calendar while still experiencing the joy of the season?
· Schedule a personal day to retreat for prayer and scripture reading. Christmas is a great time to remember what Christ has done for us, the miracles in our life, and times of Christ’s nearness. Spend time worshipping; worship rejuvenates our soul!
· Be intentional. It is easy to be distracted and let your mind wander to the next event, time slot, or woman in line rather than really listen to hear what is being said by a woman who catches us in the church hallway or at an event. To prevent the wandering mind, look into the eyes of the speaker. Observe her actions as she speaks. If red flags are raised, schedule a time to talk further with her or suggest someone she can talk with further.
· Recognize the challenges of the season. The challenges that come with the season leave women vulnerable and in need of a listening ear and caring heart. If we as leaders are not prepared for the season spiritually, the multitude of challenges overwhelms us.
· Determine to be present in the moment. Celebrate Christ! Worship Him. Laugh and be a kid again. Enjoy the moments by slowing down and put worries on the throne of grace.
· Stay away from the shopping trap of overspending. Spending too much for gifts brings guilt that robs the joy of Christmas. No one will remember next year what their presents were but they will remember our presence.
· Delegate to keep sane! All requests for assistance do not have to be filled by the leader! Enlist other women to help.
· Know when to say, “No!” There are limits to what can be done, whether it is adding another event to the personal or church calendar, or giving assistance. Saying yes to every request leaves us exhausted, burned out, and resentful: not positive emotions!
· Understand that life continues to happen during the season. Washing machines will overflow, cars will breakdown, tragedies will happen. Life’s normal crises seem more daunting during the Christmas season. Take things one thing at a time.
· Relax! Get outside, exercise, and breathe! Taking care of physical needs helps us be prepared for challenges and drama.
To keep my sanity through the month, I am focusing on one day at a time; one person at a time; one event at a time. I’m practicing the word, “No!” and scheduling time to relax and enjoy the family. Challenges will continue to come and surprise me. In fact, today one knocked the breath out of me. But the sweet Holy Spirit sent encouragers and re-directed me to spend time with Him. My aim is to keep the Minister Monster at bay during this season!
Dr. Deb Douglas, is the Minister to Women, First Baptist Church, Bossier City, LA and also serves as one of our LifeWay Ministry Multipliers. Deb launched her first women's Bible study at the age of 20. Her passion is encouraging and equipping women to serve. She is the Minister to Women at FBC Bossier City and a conference/retreat speaker, strategic planning consultant, and freelance writer. Deb graduated from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary with a Masters of Arts in Christian Education/Women's Ministry and a Doctor of Education in Ministry degree from NOBTS. She is the wife of Paul, mom of Jared and Katie, and mother-in-law to Emily.
You will be inspired regarding your own team as you read this blog by guest writer, Simone Monroe, Director of Women’s Ministries at Lake Pointe Church in Dallas, Texas.TEAM is an intangible. I began thinking about this a few days ago as I tried to answer the questions coming from the other end of the phone. A friend called to discuss how to get women on a leadership team to accept one another and work together as a team. These were women of different generations with different passions and different life experiences.
As we talked, I began thinking about the team with which I presently work. I have never seen a group of women bond together and become as effective as they have. There is absolutely no reason this should exist with a team of 37 and from 5 different campuses! My mind searched for the reason or reasons this has happened. As I thought about their range in age (26-69), the diverse passions they hold (everything from prayer, mentoring, missions and teaching bible, to service projects, hospitality, photography and organization), the different life experiences they have (single, married with no children, married with children, grandchildren, widowed and divorced) and the five distinctively different campuses they attend and serve, I began to realize it was not their passion for women’s ministry, their desire to serve, or their having known each other for long periods of time( most of them did not know one another until they came on the leadership team) that makes them so close as a team. I believe the thing that has bonded them together so quickly is the time they spend with one another –relationships.
I’m not talking about time working together in women’s ministry- I’m referring to the time they spend getting to know one another. It is about how they value one another. We spend time at every meeting just talking and playing with one another. Most of them realize this as very purposeful. They check with one another about family situations, effects of their ministry area, and have playful interchange –the kind that true friends engage in. Their relationships are deepened by the constant prayer emails that go out for urgent requests they might have. This has fostered friendships. They call, email, send cards of encouragement to one another, and even minister during times of sickness- all without being prompted. This may seem logical until you recall they come from five different campuses in five different areas of the metroplex and one campus is of another culture entirely.
It is not uncommon for a woman who leads worship to help by running errands all day for the set up team and leaving just enough time to change clothes before leading worship at the event. Or you might find a 26 year old woman who leads our young women’s ministry serving at our older single women’s brunch. You may even find 52 volunteers squeezing into a small building for an entire evening with no air-conditioning to serve the women of an illegal community by cutting and styling their hair, applying make-up, and helping them to pick out an outfit for a fashion show to be followed by individual pictures for them to have as souvenirs. All of this just to give those women an evening for themselves. One of the volunteers was having surgery at 8am the next morning.
Why would they take on something that doesn’t fall under their area of responsibility? They do it because they value the other person and have developed more than just a working relationship- they have developed true loving relationship with one another. Does this mean they hang out together all the time like BFF’s? No, although some do hang out together. It is more about loving one another and learning from one another. After all, people want to know and learn from others who do life well. All of us do life well in some area. There is something to be learned and something we can learn from one another. This team realizes that true leadership and team come, not from performing their responsibilities well, but from doing relationships well. And they certainly do that!
The more leadership invests in one another, the more rewarding the responsibilities of leadership become. The fact that we ask for help in any area of life does not mean that we have failed. It just means that we are not alone. Women want someone to do life with and leaders need this more than ever. Leadership can be lonely but it doesn’t have to – not if there is true TEAM. A good leader provides for times where relationship, not work, are the focus for time spent together. And women want to follow women who seem to be invested in others- especially those that serve out of relationship rather than responsibility. After all, I believe relationship is what Christianity is about, is it not?
Simone Monroe is also a Global Strategist for ProvenWay Ministries and LifeWay Ministry Multiplier. As a speaker, conference leader, and freelance writer, she is also a member of the Association of Women’s Ministry Professionals. Simone has earned a Masters degree in Christian Leadership and a Certificate in Women’s Leadership from Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Forth Worth, TX. Simone’s passion is teaching and developing women to fulfill their God-given potential. She enjoys presenting God's Word in a fresh and relevant way in order to encourage growth in the lives of her listeners. Her two sons, their wives, and her five grandchildren are the light of her life. Helpful resources:
How would you answer that question yourself?
For those I have walked closest with in ministry, there wasn’t a “pursuing” really. There was a “following.” For me personally, the ministry call came subtly and slowly. I realize that is not how it is for everyone, but it was for me. The Lord, through Bible study groups, convicted me that I needed to be serving Him as well as learning about Him. As I began to serve, I was so blessed and fulfilled doing it, that I thought, “Why didn’t I start this earlier?” I never wanted to not be serving.
As I grew in discipleship, I had such a desire to help other women grow spiritually and little by little God began pushing me into uncomfortable places of leadership that truly stretched me beyond what I knew I could do. But I saw what He did when I allowed Him to work through me.
From lay person to part time on my church staff to eventually full time on that staff, the Lord moved. Each step was something God urged me to do as opposed to my looking for those open doors. I believe that when we are following on a daily basis, He opens doors right where we are. Sometimes He then moves us into other areas or locations, doing the same or even different types of ministry. Or He grows the ministry we are currently involved in. Or He encourages us to train others for ministry.
I guess the question is, are we serving right where God has us today? If not, why would God open bigger or different doors? He might, but I am just asking the question for us to ponder. Sometimes women will want to be on a platform and when asked this very question the answer has sometimes been, “Oh, I am so busy with my calling, I don’t have time to pour into women’s lives in my church (or community, or….).” To me that is a red flag.
The women in leadership or teaching that I know best are women who just served faithfully in their church equipping the body, and then God began to urge them into new and different realms of ministry. And I must say, many of us who have experienced His urging, moved obediently but kicking and screaming and asking, “God, are you sure about this?”
Wherever God has us RIGHT NOW, is where He wants to use us. I love this thought: “God has not placed us where we are simply for the output we can produce, whether at a factory, at a desk, at school, or at homes with children. He has put us there because that is a context in which he wants to display Himself.” –Chris Tiegreen (Colossians 3:23).
Let’s be faithful right here, and be ready for any and all doors He may ask us to walk through when He calls. God is up to something in and through you today, right where you are.
Tell us what God is doing through you right now.
Helpful Resources:
Attending the Bride
Discerning the Voice of God
Esther
Faithful Abundant & True
Pursuing More of Jesus
