Have you ever faced difficulty as a leader? Now I know that’s a rhetorical question. If you are breathing, you have faced difficulty!  But how do we do it? How do we not give up when we face trials, personal or ministry related, while we are leading in ministry?

Surely you’ve faced struggles as you’ve been serving unless you are brand new. Why haven’t you given up? I can tell you, when I began facing trials while leading ministry, my first thought was to get out of leadership. I wrote about this experience in the blog post Leading Women’s Ministry in Difficult Seasons of Life. But God would not let me leave the ministry He had called me to. In fact He gave me ministry at times to give me a place to pour and feel like I was making a difference even in the midst of feeling like a failure in other areas where the struggles existed.  It added some balance to my life.

Why haven’t I given up?  Because God is and has been totally faithful and victorious in every situation.

I shared the following tips at a recent women’s leadership conference and on our last web cast. These are 7 things God has taught me over many years of life and ministry.

1.    Pray Honestly and Thankfully. God can take our honest praying, even if we are crying out in anger and pain. Paul tells us in Ephesians 6:18 “With every prayer and request, pray at all times in the Spirit, and stay alert in this, with all perseverance and intercession for all the saints.” We must pray even if we don’t want to or know what to say. We must pray continually and with thanksgiving (1 Thessalonians 5:18)
2.    Claim Scripture. His truth is truth always, and it will sustain and help us navigate difficult journeys. Here are many that He has given me over time that I even now go back to time and again to claim. Print them off and keep them handy: Romans 5:3-5, Romans 8:18, James 1:2-4,1 Peter 1:3-9, James 1:12, Philippians 4:6-7, John 14: 27,2 Thessalonians 3:16, Romans 15:13, Romans 4:20-21.
3.    Admit the Pain. Trying to fake it won’t work. Psalm 40:1 says I waited patiently for the LORD, and He turned to me and heard my cry for help. He already knows and your Christian sisters and co-leaders need to know when you hurt. If you stuff it, you will pray the price.
4.    Accept Help. Once you admit the pain, accept the help the Lord and others offer you. Accept their prayers, cards, hugs and wise insight as you face your struggles. I had a sweet young lady leave a note and scripture on my car windshield one day when she knew I was struggling and knew some of the issue. I cherished and kept that note to re-read. I was blessed that others knew and cared rather than judged.
5.    Hear God’s Messages. God will speak if we will only listen and watch for His messages. It could be through sermons, scripture, books, other people or music. The Lord gave me a song one day as I had just found out my dad had cancer and it did not look good. (In fact he only lived 4 months after the diagnosis.) The song is an old Tim Sheppard some, In His Arms. I am sure it had already been on the radio a while, but I’d never heard the words till that day as I sat in my office with the radio on. It had a line that says, “What is death but a door to the promised land, what is life living for without hope in the end, what is life without longing to be in His arms for eternity?” As I listened that day, I was so encouraged that my dad would be in Jesus’ arms when he left us. How I needed that message that day. Don’t be guilty of what we read in Job 33:14, “For God speaks time and again, but a person may not notice it.” Notice it!
6.    Continually Praise. I had a flip over calendar once that said, “Praise is more spontaneous when things go right, but it’s much more precious when things go wrong.” It becomes that “sacrifice of praise” when it’s hard and when we hurt and are confused. But we can claim this with the psalmist, “The one who lives under the protection of the Most High dwells in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” He is worthy of our praise especially in trials. 1 Thessalonians 5:16 tells us to “Rejoice always.” My former pastor love to say, “Rejoice when you don’t feel like it, rejoice till you feel like it, then rejoice because you feel like it.” That’s rejoicing ever more. That’s continually praising our Creator God.
7.    Hope. Just remember to always hope. So many times in scripture we see someone who is at their wits end but who walked with God anyway. Habakkuk 3:17-19 is a favorite memory verse of mine.  “Though the fig tree does not bud and there is no fruit on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will triumph in the LORD; I will rejoice in the God of my salvation!  Yahweh my Lord is my strength; He makes my feet like those of a deer and enables me to walk on mountain heights!”  And what about Micah’s words, “Do not rejoice over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will stand up; though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light.  (Micah 7:8) And even Job who lost everything, “Even if He kills me, I will hope in Him. I will still defend my ways before Him.” (Job 13:15).

I pray that you will use these ideas to help you navigate your next struggle as you lead and serve others. Perhaps you have some tips to share with our readers of how you deal with struggles. Please share those in the comments section.   The next post I will share 3 results of being transformed through trials. Keep watching.
 

Not sure if this time of year causes you to reflect like it does me. I take a good bit of vacation time in December. I spend time doing some of nothing, some projects, and listening to God as I seek His direction for 2010. I am not one to make lots of New Year’s resolutions, but I do consider where I’ve been in the current year and where God might be directing for the next one.

 Looking back, I see relationships that have grown, some that have been difficult, others just starting. There are events that have been highlights and others that were more of a challenge. I see God’s hand throughout each one. My prayer is that in 2010, not one event will be handled any other way but His way, and leaders will be blessed, encouraged as well as equipped through each one. 

 There is also a bit of uncertainty as the new year approaches…what will it bring, what joys and challenges will I face. This time last year I had no idea that I’d lose my mom in 2009 and a week later on our 38^th anniversary celebration weekend we would find out my husband had lost his job. But God has been faithful every single step of the way!

 Our time is in His hands (Ps. 31:15 NKJV) If we believe that, we should live like we do! What are you thinking as the year is ending and a new one is beginning? Where do you want Him to work in your spiritual life this next year? Write it down (and feel free to share it here), pray over it and watch Him work. This time next year, reflect to see what He has done!

Ever had a Christmas where you had to laugh to keep from crying? You might still be giggling about something that happened at your house this year or years past.

 We still laugh when we recall the year I’d worked long and hard to pick just the right gifts, wrapped them carefully and placed them beneath the tree so we could get curious and excited about what was in them. Our twins were in middle school or perhaps even late elementary school, but old enough to be left at home alone for short periods.

 One night I was sitting on the couch and noticing how sloppily I’d wrapped the gifts. I looked closer only to see masking tape. Now I’ve NEVER used masking tape on a wrapped gift! After some investigating, I found out one of my twins had unwrapped every gift to both girls while the other twin just watched. Now, they knew everything they were getting for Christmas! I was furious at the time, but it has become a fun memory for all of us.

What are your funniest Christmas experiences? Did you capture it on video? If so, send to us. If you win the funniest video, you will win a prize!

This time last year, my mom was living at an assisted living facility, fell and shattered her shoulder and broke several ribs. We didn’t even know it for a couple of days, but just said her side hurt. We aren’t sure how she fell, nor could she tell us because of her dementia. After an x-ray, she was hospitalized for about a week. When she returned to her home, she never fully regained her strength. 

We celebrated Christmas in her room last year since she was unable to come to our house. After our kids and grandkids opened presents and ate lunch at our house, one daughter decided to visit my mom. She felt compelled to tell her husband to go on home and leave her there to visit longer. 

Someone had brought a litter of puppies to the home and my daughter got one for mom to hold. My mom loved dogs and always had one until she moved into The Terrace. That puppy slept for hours by my mom’s side while my daughter sat and watched. 

I arrived later to bring my mom presents and Christmas dinner. She didn’t have a lot of interest in either. But she knew that puppy was there. 

Because she got out of the hospital so quickly and did not develop pneumonia, we were sure she was on the road to recovery. We were not prepared when her caretakers called one Sunday morning as we were returning from church that she was not responsive. We arrived 5 minutes later but she had already gone on to the Father’s arms. 

This year will be different for us. Mentally, we lost the mom I knew about 3 years before she died, but physically it’s only been less than a year. The joy I find even as I weep knowing this year, she celebrates with Jesus face to face. You can’t beat that!

Our LifeWay Christmas Chapel was yesterday. The story was about a family who had lost their mom the past year and they would be trying to figure out how to “do it” without her. I held it together till the last song, Christmas in Heaven. Without a tissue, and with a friend weeping in sympathy, I lost it. But the message of hope in this song is what makes this Christmas wonderful, even though Mom is not here with us in the flesh.

If you are experiencing a first Christmas following the death of a loved one, or even a divorce or other broken relationship, pray for the peace that passes all understanding (Phil 4:7) . Rejoice that He is faithful no matter what we are facing this year (Heb. 10:23). Allow others to minister to you and hold on to the hope that is within! He will not fail you or me, and for that we love and adore Him!"

As a women’s ministry leader, I have navigated the years of ministry long enough to have dealt with numerous difficult seasons. At times I’ve had ministry to help me keep my focus.  It has also provided a positive diversion during sometimes long seasons of pain and frustration in other facets of my life.

Not long after my husband and I surrendered to ministry (thinking it was for him and not me!), we began to face one problem after another. First of all things broke. We’d been married about 15 years so it was time for all appliances, furniture and even cars to fall apart and they did! Next came job loss. 

At first we wondered if we had not heard correctly from the Lord and began to question our call to full time ministry. So, we prayed again and asked for clarification.  He confirmed for us that we’d heard right and we must continue to follow if we were to obey Him.

I was serving already in a part time staff position leading women’s ministry and missions education at my former church, Green Acres Baptist in Tyler, TX. We continued moving forward,  facing the issues and often the enemy head on, serving and seeking direction daily.  Then a difficult season with a daughter began. My first thoughts at that time were that I must resign ministry positions since my family was having such personal difficulties. But God did not allow that. I realized that perfect people leading ministry weren’t very relevant to those they were seeking to minister to. My life was real with real problems and God had called me to lead women from my present experiences during this season.

There were many hard days but as I continued to follow God’s direction personally and ministerally, He showered me with His peace and used me in the midst of the struggle and often, the pain. Life continued and then I faced a time of switching roles with my mom as she developed dementia and became fully dependent on me to take care of her needs. She lived in an assisted living facility for three years prior to her death this past January.  You can read the story Becoming Your Mom’s Mom 

As responsibilities grew with her, I often became exhausted and even saddened at the loss of my mom as I knew her. It became difficult leaving town as I had to travel often with my work at LifeWay. Worry about her and her health were always on my mind. Again, as I spent time with the Lord and asked His direction, He never failed to give me the strength I needed. 

We cannot quit serving because we face difficulties in life. God knows each one, and has allowed each one for a purpose. We may not always know the purpose, but we can trust the One Who does! We must have real women leading women. Women who understand what it’s like to struggle as a woman, to deal with real life issues, and yet who seeks heavens perspective of each experience.   Recently I completed T. W. and Melana Hunt’s study, From Heaven’s View.  I highly recommend you do the Bible study.  When we see from God’s viewpoint, it changes how we live and how we lead.

What do you do when you face a difficult season of life while serving in ministry?

Another great resources is Raising Moms by Rhonda Kelley