The state of my heart
Melanie - February 16, 2010
Ever since the new year began, I've really been asking God to show me the dark places of my heart. You know, those places that I may not even know are there, but are ultimately keeping me from what He has for me. The first things He revealed to me were some specific ways that I was letting my insecurities rule my life and so I've begun the process of letting Him heal those things in me.
It's been a lot of fun. Not painful or gut-wrenching AT ALL.
Then, while I was in Houston at the Scripture Memory Event (Have I mentioned the Scripture Memory Event before? My word at the incessant posting about it.) I was in the midst of worship, when I felt Him say, "You put yourself on the altar of your heart".
Honestly, I've struggled over whether or not I can even admit that here because it broke my heart. Mainly because it's true.
I am so guilty of putting my own comfort, my own wants, and my own desires ahead of seeking what God wants me to do. And so I'm letting it go. There is only One that should be on the altar of my heart and it's not me. What He has for me may not always be comfortable and may not always look the way I think it should look, but I know His heart enough to know that's it always the best.
"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ." Phillipians 3:7-8
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Melanie
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Comments (3)
“There is only One that should be on the altar of my heart and it’s not me.”
Amen, siesta, amen. May we always know this (and not have to relearn it over and over…you know what I mean).
Posted on February 16, 2010 1:25 PM
I needed that today how often I put my needs and wants and desires before God Lord help us to put you first and then everything else after Lord help us to live for you and fill our lifes Lord thank you for Lifeway all access and the women that run it and for this blog. Love Carol
Posted on February 16, 2010 4:49 PM
Melanie - I just wanted you to know I’ll be praying alongside you! I know that so many of us (me included ahem) could say the same thing about putting ourselves on our heart’s altar. Or our husbands, or children, or money, or food, or whatever else — it doesn’t belong there!
Posted on February 16, 2010 7:56 PM